celebrity(ish) stalker
not me but them, or rather him!

that washed-up has-been that is RUSS ABBOT grrrrrr. the sneaky cnut followed me around glasgow a number of years ago. goes like this...

1st mrs blaireau69, blaireau69, the optomotrest and his wifeling thing had all gone to glasgow for a weekend of serious debauchery culminating with smashing pumpkins final uk date as the climax, as it were.

so that sets the date.

we were mixing it up in a vigourous style, champagne and absynthe cocktails, gin, weed, speed, e's and charley.

arriving early friday evening we visit a very smart restaurant for dinner and lots of wine. halfway through my jugged hare the optomotrest tells me to look over my shoulder in a totally indiscreet manner (which i manage with a flourish) and see what i behold... sitting there grinning at me with what i can only describe as a paedosmirk on his face is the man himself. pleasantries were exchanged (by me "your that abbott, aren't you!) and that, i thought, was that.

saturday late lunchtime we're in famous "ready to eat" (the clue's right there folks) sandwich place and i'm standing at the counter olive and feta in hand waiting to pay. someone steps up next to me holding chicken and ham on brown. i see his reflection in the shiny stainless steel splashback behind the counter. it's him AGAIN. i look to my right and say, you guessed it, "you're that abbot, aren't you!!"

sunday lunchtime, we're in a lovely wee smokey dive bar having a couple of hairs of the dogs. belhaven with grouse chasers i think. needing to make water i nip to the gents. and who was standing with his back to me pointing percy at the porcelain of the only other urinal? that's right, it's HIM. AGAIN!!! so i stand next to him join in the fun. i turn towards him and whisper (all together now!!) "you're that abbott, aren't you!" our eyes meet and i see bewilderment and a faint glimpse of terror.
we finish at the same time and leave, he holds the door open for me.

monday 11.45, glasgow central station, seriously hungover and still buzzing from gig the night before (as well as plenty of sex and drugs) sitting on a bench waiting for a train. i decide i need sustainance in the form of fags and viz so wander over to the kiosk thingy (you could still smoke in the station back in those days). i'm standing at the counter and guess who steps up next to me? that's right, russ abbott. and guess what i said to him? sure did!!! "you're that abbott, arent you!" but added a dismissive "PAH!!!" as i walked away. got him, right in the ego.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 2 Feb 2008, 16:32, 2 replies)

Ace...
PAH!
(SillyMoo, Sat 2 Feb 2008, 18:09, closed)

I hold the
claim to fame of actually appearing on the balding plugged haired 80's comedien television show - and he was a right diva... alothugh at the time I thoguht what a twunt, I too now shout at kids on bmx's ruining my imaginary television shows...
(feedingtimeatthezoo day 1 of his bikini diet started, Sun 3 Feb 2008, 0:23, closed)