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This is a question Surprise!

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver asks: Ever given granny a heart attack on her 90th birthday or knocked down the wall between the living room and kitchen by mistake before the wife gets home? Tell us tales of surprises and their fluffy and/or messy endings.

(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 12:10)
Pages: Popular, 4, 3, 2, 1

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Transparent Hedges
In 2006, I hired a workman whose ultimate ambition was to become a maker of back yard fountains. He talked me into allowing him to make his first fountain in my back yard.

When he finished, he realized there was a problem. The hedges bounding the yard made it hard for passersby (and potential customers) to see his fountain. Marketing is everything after all! So, without informing me first, he cut off all the foliage below eye-level, all around the yard, so everyone (including casual thieves looking for loose tools) could gaze with wonderment into the yard.

The workman figured the foliage would soon grow back. The trouble, of course, is that hedges will sprout new foliage only at the top and sides, and rarely at the bottom, so the gaping wounds were permanent.

Since 2006, new, weedy plants have sprung from the ground below the hedges, and slowly filled in the holes. For the purpose of privacy it took about four years to stop feeling so exposed.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 20:04, 4 replies)
God. Imagine a world where people hadn't invented fences.
It must be awful for you.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 20:14, closed)
Fences? How terribly non-U.

(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 20:38, closed)
Fountain in your back yard?
And a story about trimming your bush?
This is just an elaborate euphemism isn't it?
(, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 1:16, closed)
I was thinking the same
Loose tools? Bit more ruffage needed.
(, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 15:10, closed)

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Pages: Popular, 4, 3, 2, 1