Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
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Cars and PoliceMy folks are sensible people, well educated and were always concerned to do their best for their kids. Sadly, my father is a little less responsible when egged on by a car loving child.
This led to my first ever encounter with the police. We were on a lonely and deserted beach near Liverpool in his car and to amuse us (and himself) he was chucking it about in a variety of ever faster handbrake and J turns.
Then he thought he'd let me have a go. At the age of 11. I was having loads of fun sitting on his knee, changing gear and steering while he operated the pedals when blue flashing lights appeared in the rear view mirror.
A police car pulled up beside us and asked my Dad "Is he 17?". There was a pause, and my Dad suggested that if I was 17 I probably wouldn't be sitting on his knee.
We were escorted from the beach, to my Grandmother's bungalow 100 yards away, whereon arrival my mother became a little excited at the sight of a red faced father being ticked off by the filth.
Also he took us sledging and told us it would be great fun to sledge off the edge of a hill, with a 6 foot drop to the ground. It was, until my brother broke his arm.
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Wed 22 Aug 2007, 11:51,
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