Seriously though
Here are some things I have owned but since lost or forgotten as I've moved from place to place. Who knows where they are now.

- Letters written to me by famous authors in reply to my fan letters. I had handwritten notes from Elmore Leonard (Get Shorty, Jackie Brown), Clive Cussler (Raise the Titanic) and David Morrell (First Blood).
- A first edition of The Man with the Golden Gun.
- A Sheffield-made palette knife that was a piece of art.
- Half a bottle of 18-year-old Strathisla single malt whisky.
- A cassette of a uni housemate drunkenly admitting to paedophile fantasies (he's a teacher now).
- Numerous stories that I wrote on a manual typewriter in pre-internet days. I remember that one of them was about a sex maniac squirrel.
- A Raleigh hybrid bike that went like a dream.
- Numerous nudey pictures of exes.
(frankspencer, Tue 13 May 2008, 12:07, 11 replies)

paedo teachers
and sex maniac squirrels earn you one of my seldom given clicks.

*click*
( Mortal Wombatteries not included - Awesome Awesome Awesome, Tue 13 May 2008, 12:15, closed)

Are you sure you didn't drink the whisky.
What an eclectic collection of lost treasures.
( girlinthehole, Tue 13 May 2008, 12:51, closed)

Nudey Pictures
A friend of mine was dating this stunning girl when we were all in our teens. He most memorably exclaimed one pub session that he had borrowed his dad's video camera and taken a short film of himself having anal sex with his GF.


The girl is now a very famous primetime TV presenter. When her fame trail started I asked him what happened to the video. He told me that he had accidently recorded "big brother" over it many years ago

I dont know whats worse - him losing this possible "pension" or him recording big brother
( KISS.ME.WHERE.I.POO Signed the sex offenders register on, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:04, closed)

Come on...
We need a name!
It won't incriminate your friend.
( Cawl, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:06, closed)

or if not a name
give us a channel and a time she might be on.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:12, closed)

Letters written by famous authors in reply to fan letters.
My sister once wrote a badly spelled 'fan-letter' to Jo Brand criticizing her 'obvious' sense of humour and promised to heckle her in Latin. She got a nasty reply where Jo Brand called her a "stuck-up little madam". This was just before my sister went off to uni, and one of the events during fresher's week at her uni was an appearance by Jo Brand. So along with all the usual problems freshers had to face, my sister had to put up with being on the same campus as Jo Brand.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:15, closed)

same campus
eh? How bad could that actually be? I'm a bit annoyed I have to share manchester with Manchester City but I get by.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:18, closed)

sorry, but
I just don't believe you.

Except for the bit about the sex maniac squirrel.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:25, closed)

Man City
were much harder to avoid when they were in Rusholme. It must be dead easy to avoid them now they've moved north.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 13 May 2008, 13:31, closed)

I would love to name and shame
But, without any Hard (ahem) evidence I would be foolish to name the blond female presenter of a saturday night show which involved "celebrities" in a weekly knock out contest.

Would of LOVED to have seen the video - its a shame my mate was so bashful of his penis (which was known as "alphabet" after the deep fried potatoe treat)
( KISS.ME.WHERE.I.POO Signed the sex offenders register on, Tue 13 May 2008, 15:05, closed)

OMG!
Your mate lived near Burgess Hill then did he?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 13 May 2008, 15:43, closed)