I'm Afraid
That I can't take credit for this. It's an old post from my blog where I adapted and complied a bunch of stuff to advise people on what to do if faced with the supernatural. Very little of is it my own work.

Cheers


When it appears that you have killed the monster, *never* check to see if it's really dead.

If you find that your house is built upon or near a cemetery, was once a church used for black masses, had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices in your house, move away immediately.

Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

Do not search the cellar, especially if the power has gone out.

If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, or if they speak to you using a voice which is other than their own, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. NOTE: It will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared.

When you have the benefit of numbers, *never* pair off and go it alone.

As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or anywhere near a grave, tomb, crypt, mausoleum, or other house of the dead.

If you're searching for something which caused a noise and find out that it's just the cat, leave the room immediately if you value your life.

If appliances start operating by themselves, move out.

Do not take *anything* from the dead.

If you find a town which looks deserted, it's probably for a reason. Take the hint and stay away.

Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.

If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behaviour such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, get away from them as fast as possible.

Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

If your car runs out of petrol at night, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help.

And again,

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Tue 8 Jul 2008, 14:21, 4 replies)

Troll 2
What an awful movie.
(powervator and NONE SHALL PASS, Tue 8 Jul 2008, 15:40, closed)

Oh my Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawd.
=O
( Digeridude Lord Wellington's Beef Trapeze, Tue 8 Jul 2008, 16:57, closed)

troll 2
hahaha...popcorn sex. bad memories.
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Wed 9 Jul 2008, 10:35, closed)

I think...
if you are a member of B3ta you are expected to recognize Nilbog....
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 10 Jul 2008, 14:56, closed)