» I'm going to Hell...

Jehovas witnesses and me; a conversation
Two jehovas witnesses came to my door once, old ladies to be precise.

I was slightly bored and didn't have the heart to turn them away without at least engaging them, theyre just doing their religiousy job, etc. so decided to be politely interested and converse with them while firmly maintaining a distance between myself and religion. However being politely interested is difficult when theyre talking an absolute load of shite and youre stifling laughter and keep smiling like a bloody loon because of the urge to laugh at them.

After a minute or so of smiling and barely-hidden giggles while chatting the shorter of the two said said 'why do you keep laughing at what we're saying?'

Thinking on my feet I replied 'Well, like Jesus said, without laughter there can be no joy!'

"Well Jesus also knew there was a time to be serious."

"Yeah, I guess he wasn't laughing on the cross, was he."


They didn't come back.
(Mon 15th Dec 2008, 22:06, More)

» Best Comebacks

Once,
Me and some mates were hangin' oot, like us teens do, and the usual insulting starting flying about. My mate Chaz (don't laugh)was bein a particular twat, but then an ice cream van came up, music blaring.

Him: Ice cream!
Me: The music means they've ran out, y'dickead.

Needless to say, it shut him up!
(Thu 29th Apr 2004, 21:27, More)