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- a member for 19 years, 3 months and 1 day
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» I was drunk when I bought this
not so much bought....
18th Birthday a couple of days back; got more than suitably lubricated before supposedly staggering back in a haze to my mates house.
Woke up in cold sweat, still gassed, and declared my hair as an excessive nuisance whilst negotiating a bowl of coco pops. Cue cutting off every last fibre from my scalp with kitchen scissors, and then running over the whole thing with a mach 3 for good measure. In my inebriated state I thought it almost stylish, but realising it had traversed the realms of "scary cool" baldness, and into the "oh christ theres something wrong with him" baldness, me and my hat have been rendered somewhat symbiotic, it's only adjournment from its ceaseless clasp of my head being when i take rather belated trips to the shower. Incidentally, during the whole charade I had the theme from animal hospital running through my head, which slightly worries me.
Still, a week of looking like a nutcase and then I'll be good as new.... I think
(Thu 9th Jun 2005, 20:14, More)
not so much bought....
18th Birthday a couple of days back; got more than suitably lubricated before supposedly staggering back in a haze to my mates house.
Woke up in cold sweat, still gassed, and declared my hair as an excessive nuisance whilst negotiating a bowl of coco pops. Cue cutting off every last fibre from my scalp with kitchen scissors, and then running over the whole thing with a mach 3 for good measure. In my inebriated state I thought it almost stylish, but realising it had traversed the realms of "scary cool" baldness, and into the "oh christ theres something wrong with him" baldness, me and my hat have been rendered somewhat symbiotic, it's only adjournment from its ceaseless clasp of my head being when i take rather belated trips to the shower. Incidentally, during the whole charade I had the theme from animal hospital running through my head, which slightly worries me.
Still, a week of looking like a nutcase and then I'll be good as new.... I think
(Thu 9th Jun 2005, 20:14, More)
» Losing Your Virginity
Self simulation
Actually, I discovered when I was 14 that you can replicate the act of coitus with one's own hand
None of this "women" lark needed; and much time is saved to fill out loan applications and such. And if your patient; you can give them a more natural substitute for ink.
They weren't too impressed, mind.
Anyway, can't stay long, must sign my mothers day card
(Sat 5th Mar 2005, 16:14, More)
Self simulation
Actually, I discovered when I was 14 that you can replicate the act of coitus with one's own hand
None of this "women" lark needed; and much time is saved to fill out loan applications and such. And if your patient; you can give them a more natural substitute for ink.
They weren't too impressed, mind.
Anyway, can't stay long, must sign my mothers day card
(Sat 5th Mar 2005, 16:14, More)
» Easiest Job Ever
This
I bloody love bangin dem drums. So much so that I thought id do this during edinburgh festival.
Moneys great. Backs fucked mind you
www.youtube.com/watch?v=79xFYqa-X1Y
(Thu 9th Sep 2010, 16:30, More)
This
I bloody love bangin dem drums. So much so that I thought id do this during edinburgh festival.
Moneys great. Backs fucked mind you
www.youtube.com/watch?v=79xFYqa-X1Y
(Thu 9th Sep 2010, 16:30, More)
» Teenage Poetry
Poem
Subdivisions
Like vagrants, crossing laminate floors
Digitized lives in superstores
Flitting in networks, so painfully aware
Of what they need or want within
The criss-cross of isles
Like a gestured smile
Pacified grace;
An obscured face
A fleeting appeal that flaunts to conceal
Its callous rhythm like metronome
And its sinuous web bears no thoughts of home
But eviscerates height in clinical light
To pack and folk in fastened sight
As the vigils pivot to their flight;
Grasping at a visionless target-
To stretch the margin ever wider
And to narrow at the character that persists to bind
Time to self, and self to time
But its slow revolve grants myopic roles
Left with little but pallid soul;
A faded whole
Spectres that glide
In a sightless stride
With nothing to regret
And nothing to find
(Mon 15th Aug 2005, 17:09, More)
Poem
Subdivisions
Like vagrants, crossing laminate floors
Digitized lives in superstores
Flitting in networks, so painfully aware
Of what they need or want within
The criss-cross of isles
Like a gestured smile
Pacified grace;
An obscured face
A fleeting appeal that flaunts to conceal
Its callous rhythm like metronome
And its sinuous web bears no thoughts of home
But eviscerates height in clinical light
To pack and folk in fastened sight
As the vigils pivot to their flight;
Grasping at a visionless target-
To stretch the margin ever wider
And to narrow at the character that persists to bind
Time to self, and self to time
But its slow revolve grants myopic roles
Left with little but pallid soul;
A faded whole
Spectres that glide
In a sightless stride
With nothing to regret
And nothing to find
(Mon 15th Aug 2005, 17:09, More)
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