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- a member for 21 years, 9 months and 6 days
- has posted 3 messages on the main board
- has posted 1 messages on the talk board
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- has posted 4 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
- They liked 4 pictures, 1 links, 0 talk posts, and 2 qotw answers.
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» Will you go out with me?
Beer was involved...
A friend and I sat down at the Ashton Court festival in Bristol with 24 cans of Blackthorn for a solid days drinking. 2 young ladies were sat in front of us with 24 cans of Stella, one of them turned around and said "Snakebite?"
9 years on and I marry her on October the 4th, yay!
(Wed 3rd Sep 2008, 16:51, More)
Beer was involved...
A friend and I sat down at the Ashton Court festival in Bristol with 24 cans of Blackthorn for a solid days drinking. 2 young ladies were sat in front of us with 24 cans of Stella, one of them turned around and said "Snakebite?"
9 years on and I marry her on October the 4th, yay!
(Wed 3rd Sep 2008, 16:51, More)
» Evil Pranks
Never tell kids your deepest fears
In school a guy called Reggie told us he was claustrophobic. Stupid boy. He was locked in cupboard at the back of the classroom and the door was wedged shut.
Fairplay to him, he managed to sit in there comfort rocking and thinking of wide open spaces for a while.
This is boring thought I, we'd expected screams and tears so with a borrowed can of hairspray I got out my lighter and fired the improvised flamethrower through the keyhole.
Reg kicked both doors off their hinges in a superhuman effort to escape and I was in detention for 2 weeks, evil enough?
(Thu 13th Dec 2007, 16:56, More)
Never tell kids your deepest fears
In school a guy called Reggie told us he was claustrophobic. Stupid boy. He was locked in cupboard at the back of the classroom and the door was wedged shut.
Fairplay to him, he managed to sit in there comfort rocking and thinking of wide open spaces for a while.
This is boring thought I, we'd expected screams and tears so with a borrowed can of hairspray I got out my lighter and fired the improvised flamethrower through the keyhole.
Reg kicked both doors off their hinges in a superhuman effort to escape and I was in detention for 2 weeks, evil enough?
(Thu 13th Dec 2007, 16:56, More)
» Food sabotage
When food tampering gets out of hand
Working in the building trade, things tended to happen to food every now and again.
One chap pulled his rolls out one day and bit into one and someone had put a teabag in it, cue face pulling and loose tea spilling from his open mouth. Thinking it was me, I got a surprise the next day when I bit into my lovingly prepared sandwiches and chomped through a dozen matchsticks one of which stuck in the roof of my mouth.
Following day he gets a small circle of carpet in one of his rolls (again not me) at this point we realise who the culprit is. We were trying to hatch a plot, when upon removing an old radiator we found a very flat, dessicated dead mouse. We couldn't, could we? Of course we did, the look on his face, cheeks stuffed with sarnie peeling apart those 2 slices of hovis and peeking in at the dead rodent still makes me chuckle.
(Fri 19th Sep 2008, 11:13, More)
When food tampering gets out of hand
Working in the building trade, things tended to happen to food every now and again.
One chap pulled his rolls out one day and bit into one and someone had put a teabag in it, cue face pulling and loose tea spilling from his open mouth. Thinking it was me, I got a surprise the next day when I bit into my lovingly prepared sandwiches and chomped through a dozen matchsticks one of which stuck in the roof of my mouth.
Following day he gets a small circle of carpet in one of his rolls (again not me) at this point we realise who the culprit is. We were trying to hatch a plot, when upon removing an old radiator we found a very flat, dessicated dead mouse. We couldn't, could we? Of course we did, the look on his face, cheeks stuffed with sarnie peeling apart those 2 slices of hovis and peeking in at the dead rodent still makes me chuckle.
(Fri 19th Sep 2008, 11:13, More)
» Cougars and Sugar Daddies
me 23, she 49
I'd just separated from my wife, and went to a pub for all you can drink and eat for 20 quid type of night with a few friends from work.
Needless to say I was hammered before we got in there, so nailed a gram of whizz I'd been saving for just such an occasion which seemed to steady the boat ever so slightly.
She was fit, cute and up for it, so we went back to her place and did the deed for a ridiculous length of time (it was good gear) and I was just trying to get to sleep at about 6 a.m. when she handed me my clothes and told me her husband (the fireman) was just finishing his shift and would be home soon so I should fuck off.
I'm a young 34 now but that makes her 60 and I now I feel even dirtier for some reason?
(Fri 5th Dec 2008, 14:21, More)
me 23, she 49
I'd just separated from my wife, and went to a pub for all you can drink and eat for 20 quid type of night with a few friends from work.
Needless to say I was hammered before we got in there, so nailed a gram of whizz I'd been saving for just such an occasion which seemed to steady the boat ever so slightly.
She was fit, cute and up for it, so we went back to her place and did the deed for a ridiculous length of time (it was good gear) and I was just trying to get to sleep at about 6 a.m. when she handed me my clothes and told me her husband (the fireman) was just finishing his shift and would be home soon so I should fuck off.
I'm a young 34 now but that makes her 60 and I now I feel even dirtier for some reason?
(Fri 5th Dec 2008, 14:21, More)