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- a member for 12 years, 4 months and 19 days
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» Weird Rituals
I'm not quite sure if it's a ritual, or just being banally anal
but sandwiches should be sliced thuswise according to their contents:
Horizontal slice: Cheese and pickle, Ploughman's, chip butty, crisp butty, bacon and so on. Big manly sandwiches dripping with testosterone. Their purpose is to fill your tummy-box with stodge, so hack a blunt knife through the middle and stuff it in your gaping maw.
Diagonal slice: Smoked salmon and cream cheese, tuna mayo, and fillings like hummus and carrot etc. Basically, anything that you would order if you were feeling a bit fancy, looking to diet or impress someone (if you like to impress people with sandwiches).
Cut into triangles: ONLY ACCEPTABLE AT BOG-STANDARD FUNCTIONS. Office buffets, school fairs, seminars on help desk management, volunteer meetings. If you make one for yourself you look like a sad person whose friends didn't come to the party.
A pox on those who do not comply.
(Tue 20th Dec 2011, 12:02, More)
I'm not quite sure if it's a ritual, or just being banally anal
but sandwiches should be sliced thuswise according to their contents:
Horizontal slice: Cheese and pickle, Ploughman's, chip butty, crisp butty, bacon and so on. Big manly sandwiches dripping with testosterone. Their purpose is to fill your tummy-box with stodge, so hack a blunt knife through the middle and stuff it in your gaping maw.
Diagonal slice: Smoked salmon and cream cheese, tuna mayo, and fillings like hummus and carrot etc. Basically, anything that you would order if you were feeling a bit fancy, looking to diet or impress someone (if you like to impress people with sandwiches).
Cut into triangles: ONLY ACCEPTABLE AT BOG-STANDARD FUNCTIONS. Office buffets, school fairs, seminars on help desk management, volunteer meetings. If you make one for yourself you look like a sad person whose friends didn't come to the party.
A pox on those who do not comply.
(Tue 20th Dec 2011, 12:02, More)
» Weird Rituals
On finding a boyfriend's password, not being able to stop myself looking.
Shame really, as I wouldn't have found out I wasn't 'Indian enough' for his sexual leanings.
(Tue 20th Dec 2011, 11:41, More)
On finding a boyfriend's password, not being able to stop myself looking.
Shame really, as I wouldn't have found out I wasn't 'Indian enough' for his sexual leanings.
(Tue 20th Dec 2011, 11:41, More)