nooooooooooooooooooo
you have 4 hours to find a punchline or i will tear a kitten in half, film it and then show it to some children
( lordsaccharine my hat it has three cornets toot toot toot, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 13:17, archived)

OK got one
"...because they're too busy shouting and bellowing and celeb-simpering to notice the phone ringing. And its Ringo on the other end, keen to discuss his thoughts on world hunger. He hangs up and goes to put the kettle on. Again."

...

I'll get me coat.
( rmoola was thinking about a software problem, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 13:24, archived)

*tears a kitten in half, films it and then shows it to some children

( lordsaccharine my hat it has three cornets toot toot toot, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 13:26, archived)

yay!
it could have been worse. next time I'll bring a full-grown cat. much messier. the kids'll love it.
( rmoola was thinking about a software problem, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 13:36, archived)