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This is a question Ouch!

A friend was once given a biopsy by a sleep-deprived junior doctor.
They needed a sample of his colon, so inserted the long bendy jaws-on-the-end thingy, located the suspect area and... he shot through the ceiling. Doctor had forgotten to administer any anaesthetic.

What was your ouchiest moment?

(, Thu 29 Jul 2010, 17:29)
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Got a few, but this one is the most fun.
It's all comical, no lasting damage people.
December 13th, 2002. I'm 15 back then, just turned it yesterday! I have my birthday money, time to go off to the local arts and crafts store to purchase one of my last Christmas gifts, a Sketchbook for my sister. She's quite the artist, always inspired me, and I always would sneak into her room and look through her drawings. I noticed she was running out of pages, and I figured by Christmas she's be right due for a new one. I never had a ton of money, so it seemed the sensible present to give.
The local Craft store I prefer is a good mile away, and I had to wait until the parents were out since I wasn't suppose to be out that late in the weather. So I was about to set out and a good friend rang. She was a good person, a bit overly spirited, but fine. She came with. It was a tad snowy in Western New York, little cold. We traversed the massive snowbanks in parking lots and snowed in sidewalks until we got across from the shopping plaza that had the store. Time to cross near the light or it's dangerous! Union Road is at that point, about 5 lanes due to the emerging turning lane. We start to cross, she thinks "excellent, let's skip across" Grabs my arm. I was about 80 lbs then, and she was tall like an amazon. I was dragged, no balance whatsoever. There was one lane I could not see. I planned to stop there and look in the solid line of traffic (red light had stopped traffic good) to see if it was safe. We had not told each other our plans, she went across the street dragging me like a rag doll. She freaks, lets go and throws up her arms in surprise.
This second here kinda felt long. She let go and I was dragging on one foot in a half hop trying to catch up with her. So I'm now falling forward uncontrollably. I turn the umbrella I'm holding up like it'll save me like merry poppins as I fall into the 5th lane, the turning lane.

thwunk. I hit the car. I hit the pavement. I bounce twice. The whole time I manage to keep the umbrella upright. It's my mom's; she can't know I took it.
Friend freaks, thinks I'm dead, despite my ninja-roll off the pavement and onto the soggy ground. I crawl and stand upright. A distraught 50-something handicapped woman that hit me is crying and trying to call the police for my sake. Friend is HYSTERICAL. I thank the woman for her concern but I'm fine. Grab my friend's arm and hobble off.
I feel okay, no big deal. But as I walk into the plaza, something isn't right, can't breathe. I'm hobbling a bit, not worries, just a limp. My knee is swelling and my hip joint is a tad sore. I get into the art store and walk towards the sketchbooks. I realize something very important. I've been in the snow, the freezing cold for over an hour now. I'm not wearing a coat, just a heavy shirt. I realize why I was not hurt. I was totally numb from the cold. In the course of about 10 seconds, I'm overrun with burning throbbing pain all over. I shuffle to the register, buy the sketchbook, and shuffle out. Spend about 10 minutes in a snow bank on my side, and part ways with my friend at the same intersection where I was hit. She's the opposite way from there. Walk home was REAL slow, I had a bad limp. And each breath felt like a kick in the ribs. Turns out when I got home it was a lot worse than anticipated. I hid the gift and went in the basement to use the computer (Ironically, to read newsletter. Yes, I lurked for 8 years.)
Wow, I felt on FIRE in normal temps. Turns out I bruised a great deal of ribs(and my ass was purple) and permanently knackered my right hip and knee to a point. Tried to hide it from parents and limped around clutching a cue-stick from the billiard table for a few days. Luckily, my parents for some INSANE reason thought I was faking despite never having any injuries in the past of note. School on monday was rough. People chalked it up to "Friday the 13th!!"
No major lasting effects 8 years later. Knee pops when I stand up with no pain, only lasting problem is that my hip causes severe pain at some times when I sit or stand, or during sex when I'm up top. So I guess my friend indirectly fudges the old sex life a bit. My man has to usually shift me manually because I'm locked in the painful position.
Thinking back on the pain, it did hurt a lot. I only remember the two bounces on the pavement, not much of hitting the hood. But the cold negated most of it. Did tell my parents of it. ....last year. They yelled at me for shopping without them. Not for the accident. Still never saw a doc. They're a bit prickish about old injuries.

Appologies for length. No cock jokes. First QOTW post in the 9 or so years I've been around here.
(, Tue 3 Aug 2010, 11:26, 1 reply)

Well done for the first post in so many years of lurking!
(, Tue 3 Aug 2010, 13:27, closed)

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