Shit StoriesI once ate four Kendal Mint Cakes and did a white shit. My old school friend Roger had to outdo me. He claimed to have done a "blue bubbling turd" after eating six packets of blackcurrant Chewits. We want to hear your stories of poo, from crapping yourself at your sisters wedding to shitting the bed during sex. Go on - be filthy.
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rob, Wed 5 May 2004, 22:24)
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A illness pooUsually common decency dictates that if one has to take a shit, they'll hold it in until the proper facilities are available.
There are, however, exceptions to this rule.
Once I was as sick as I think I ever have been, and I was laid out on my Aunt's couch. It began by sneezing on myself, which I solved by wiping my nose on my shirt. For the second round, I threw up on myself, managing to get most of the vomit into a bucket. Though my shirt was stained and smelly, I was far too weak and sick to really care or do anything about it.
After laying in my own vomit for a while, I began to realize that I was going to have to take a shit. Well, having not done anything about trying to conceal my other bodily functions, I sure as hell wasn't going to make the effort to get off of the couch and hobble my way to a bathroom, so I promptly shit on myself.
I continued to lay on the couch, covered in vomit and poo (and the urine that is generally associated with poo) until my Aunt walked in, and mustering all of my strength, I gave her the best puppy dog face that I could muster.
You know, the kind of face that says "I'm sick and covered in shit and vomit and piss, could you lend me one of your towels?"
Needless to say, the couch was sold soon after the fact.
(, Thu 6 May 2004, 2:12, Reply)
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