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Profile for I like you much more than this telephone pole.:
Profile Info:

Hah. There's nothing for you to read in my profile.

What a let down.

Now go back to fapping.

Recent front page messages:

Shirley Bindun?

(Fri 29th Dec 2006, 8:10, More)

Bloody AOhell


It's like a plague!

First FP thanks!
(Fri 14th Nov 2003, 23:18, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Personal Ads

Oops.
I had a friend who threw up a personal:

"Single 25 y/o Male, athletic, enjoys eating out, pet lover, seeks woman, sense of humor required."

They printed it as:

"Single 25 y/o male, athletic, enjoys eating out pet, lover, seeks woman, sense of humor required."

He didn't get any calls, but he did get a refund.
(Fri 14th Sep 2007, 2:18, More)

» My first experience of porn

My first experience with porn and my first understanding of porn.
Traditional responses bore me, so here are my first endeavors in a haiku.

Daddy was wanking.
To the basement I spring.
"What's that on the telly?"

Porn, on my mind fresh!
Aroused, look, what delightful flesh!
Dad's secret stash was found!

Furious rubbing,
My equivalent scrubbing,
"Sex, this is," I thought.

Fast forward two years,
A young boy aged ten appears,
Sibling's health book found.

"What's this," the boy cries.
"What's this gash between her thighs?"
Childhood paradigm shattered.

Sudden thoughts discover truth!
In lesbian porn, you see,
Tab A avoids Slot B.
(Tue 30th Jan 2007, 0:34, More)

» Personal Ads

How deep down the rabbit hole have I gone?
I've never done the whole internet dating site thing, but I did once meet someone online. I met this lovely girl and we started chatting. So the norm is to progress to phone calls, and we did; quite a bit, in fact. Turns out she lived about two hours away from me, which was nice. She was quite fit and was lovely kinky, which made the drive sound better every day.

Until the day we decided to elaborate on our kinks. So we're having a wonderful chatty call and the topic comes up and we start taking turns sharing. Then, she says something along the lines of, "Don't tell anyone this, okay?" When someone who doesn't even live near you and who doesn't share the same friends as you say that, change the topic. I didn't and she told me as a child, she had given her pet rabbit a blow job.

I haven't gone down the rabbit hole, but chances are she has.

Lovely girl, ended up meeting her but we just didn't strike it off in person, had a few more calls after and just decided to be friends.

Length? Probably not much.
(Fri 14th Sep 2007, 2:24, More)

» Petty Sabotage

Fssshhhh
I took firecrackers and CAREFULLY gutted them.

I placed the powder in a bubble of plastic wrap.

Then I opened the resulting powder package discreetly in a public ashtray. You know, one of those you put out your cig at before you enter a smoke free building.

Halarity ensues.
(Fri 6th May 2005, 4:28, More)

» Shame

Cinemas
I was once kicked out of a cinema. Actually, I left willingly. Supposedly, you're not allowed to finger your girlfriend in the back row of a G rated movie. I left because police were involved.

No apologies for shortness, its the way you use it that counts.
(Sat 26th Nov 2005, 23:13, More)
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