Profile for Pastor of Muppets:
Me=
Middle Aged (read: way too old to be lurking about here... like 20 years too old)
Canadian (but don't be fooled cause I live on the US border so I have a disturbing tendecy towards violence... but I will say sorry afterward)
A Father (the government dropped the ball on that one - haha! it's to late now you alpha bastards!)
A Husband (only by the foolish benevolence of my spouse)
Gainfully Employed (until they see what I do with the bandwith they let me play with)
A Former... professional musician / high-level executive / clergyman (not all at once - awaiting multiple personality diagnosis)
A sad, sorry, pathetic, excuse for a human that longs only for the acceptance of the secret society of b3ta. One day.... one day...
Contact me!! Go ahead!! Try it!!
xerxes_brownAThotmailDOTcom
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Best answers to questions:
- a member for 20 years, 1 month and 0 days
- has posted 65 messages on the main board
- has posted 0 messages on the talk board
- has posted 0 messages on the links board
- has posted 3 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
- They liked 0 pictures, 0 links, 0 talk posts, and 0 qotw answers.
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Me=
Middle Aged (read: way too old to be lurking about here... like 20 years too old)
Canadian (but don't be fooled cause I live on the US border so I have a disturbing tendecy towards violence... but I will say sorry afterward)
A Father (the government dropped the ball on that one - haha! it's to late now you alpha bastards!)
A Husband (only by the foolish benevolence of my spouse)
Gainfully Employed (until they see what I do with the bandwith they let me play with)
A Former... professional musician / high-level executive / clergyman (not all at once - awaiting multiple personality diagnosis)
A sad, sorry, pathetic, excuse for a human that longs only for the acceptance of the secret society of b3ta. One day.... one day...
Contact me!! Go ahead!! Try it!!
xerxes_brownAThotmailDOTcom
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» My Wanking Disasters
O what a beautiful morning!
I worked for a public school (grammar school) in the special ed. department. One day I was on to meet the kids as they arrived via 'little bus' and taxi. As the first taxi arrived I noticed the female driver perturbed and embarrassed, leaning on her arm with hand cupping her eyes. As I approached I heard the unmistakable sounds of a young 'challenged' boy shouting in a loud voice, "AH AH AH AH AH AH AH..." I opened the rear door of the taxi to find him splayed out across the back seat, pants around ankles wanking with one hand whilst keeping similar rhythm on the driver's seat back with the other. He was having so much fun I wanted to join in! If I remember correctly I think I did later that day in the staff john... but fortunately was not discovered... until now... unless they heard the yelling and knew... oh well... sorry old school board chums! It was me!
(Tue 1st Jun 2004, 18:57, More)
O what a beautiful morning!
I worked for a public school (grammar school) in the special ed. department. One day I was on to meet the kids as they arrived via 'little bus' and taxi. As the first taxi arrived I noticed the female driver perturbed and embarrassed, leaning on her arm with hand cupping her eyes. As I approached I heard the unmistakable sounds of a young 'challenged' boy shouting in a loud voice, "AH AH AH AH AH AH AH..." I opened the rear door of the taxi to find him splayed out across the back seat, pants around ankles wanking with one hand whilst keeping similar rhythm on the driver's seat back with the other. He was having so much fun I wanted to join in! If I remember correctly I think I did later that day in the staff john... but fortunately was not discovered... until now... unless they heard the yelling and knew... oh well... sorry old school board chums! It was me!
(Tue 1st Jun 2004, 18:57, More)
» Petty Sabotage
Revenge of the Nerd
A rather annoying quarterback from our high school team (notice I did not use the term football to avoid confusion) had a high opinion of himself and his brand new (mommy and daddy puchased) Mustang. After observing with great disdain his constant bragging regarding the car's and his performance in various situations I devised a lovely bit of justice to be wrought upon him.
After purchasing a propely sized whole frying chicken from the local market, I carefully crawled under said Mustang and stuffed it on top of the magnificent high-flow muffler under the middle of the car. (All done during practice of course to prevent an altercation.) I secured the now hidden chicken with a wire coathanger to ensure the longevity of its stay.
The next morning at school, imagine my delight when the arrival of our hero is announced by a lovely baked chicken smell - quite powerful. And then try to suppose my glee when his tiny brain failed to discover our fowl friend for 5 days thus rendering it foul indeed and increasingly moreso until it's discovery in a mechanic's shop and a $200.00 bill to have it detailed to remove the stench.
Apologies for length... but it was good to finally tell all.
(Fri 6th May 2005, 14:40, More)
Revenge of the Nerd
A rather annoying quarterback from our high school team (notice I did not use the term football to avoid confusion) had a high opinion of himself and his brand new (mommy and daddy puchased) Mustang. After observing with great disdain his constant bragging regarding the car's and his performance in various situations I devised a lovely bit of justice to be wrought upon him.
After purchasing a propely sized whole frying chicken from the local market, I carefully crawled under said Mustang and stuffed it on top of the magnificent high-flow muffler under the middle of the car. (All done during practice of course to prevent an altercation.) I secured the now hidden chicken with a wire coathanger to ensure the longevity of its stay.
The next morning at school, imagine my delight when the arrival of our hero is announced by a lovely baked chicken smell - quite powerful. And then try to suppose my glee when his tiny brain failed to discover our fowl friend for 5 days thus rendering it foul indeed and increasingly moreso until it's discovery in a mechanic's shop and a $200.00 bill to have it detailed to remove the stench.
Apologies for length... but it was good to finally tell all.
(Fri 6th May 2005, 14:40, More)
» Your Revenge Stories
Keeping it simple...
My revenge on the typical north american quarterback, soaked in cologne, hair perfect, new sports car, spoiled, conceited, twunt was to attach a raw chicken to the top of his sports car muffler with some wire. The first trip had a lovely chicken fried scent - after a few days decomposing it became truly lovely... he paid quite bit of money geting the car detailed over and over before they found it... and then paid $100 cdn to have it removed! finger lickin good!
(Fri 14th May 2004, 16:00, More)
Keeping it simple...
My revenge on the typical north american quarterback, soaked in cologne, hair perfect, new sports car, spoiled, conceited, twunt was to attach a raw chicken to the top of his sports car muffler with some wire. The first trip had a lovely chicken fried scent - after a few days decomposing it became truly lovely... he paid quite bit of money geting the car detailed over and over before they found it... and then paid $100 cdn to have it removed! finger lickin good!
(Fri 14th May 2004, 16:00, More)