Profile for The Armchair Vandal:
Hello!!!!
I am a bored Insurance Underwriter from the West Midlands, who due to many unforseen circumstances in life, has been completly bypassed by talent and creativity.
So i come on here, lurk, and occasionaly post to make me seem like a creative sort of chap....except that i have less raw talent than your shirt....
If anybody has any blart that they want to send me, i can be found at [email protected]
Alternatively, come to the Severn Stars in Kidderminster and i shall buy you all a beer!!!!
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
[read all their answers]
- a member for 20 years, 0 months and 25 days
- has posted 11 messages on the main board
- has posted 0 messages on the talk board
- has posted 0 messages on the links board
- has posted 5 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
- They liked 0 pictures, 0 links, 0 talk posts, and 5 qotw answers.
- Ignore this user
- Add this user as a friend
- send me a message
Hello!!!!
I am a bored Insurance Underwriter from the West Midlands, who due to many unforseen circumstances in life, has been completly bypassed by talent and creativity.
So i come on here, lurk, and occasionaly post to make me seem like a creative sort of chap....except that i have less raw talent than your shirt....
If anybody has any blart that they want to send me, i can be found at [email protected]
Alternatively, come to the Severn Stars in Kidderminster and i shall buy you all a beer!!!!
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Shit Stories
oo..oo..oo..oo..oo..oo
After two days of need at last years Reading Festival, i finally gave in and marched to the dump shack to relieve my aching bowels.
After taking a full 20 mins to summon the courage to open my sphyncter, i reliquished power of attourney to mother nature and proceeded to give birth to a 17" monster......
As we all know, festival toilets are a little full after 3 days of beer/acid/dog burger tomfoolery, so i had to stand up on the toilet to let gravity cut the cord (so to speak....), anyway, there was a half in / half out situation and then someone opened the door, and i was stoned, and i started laughing, and they didn't understand, and it was all bad....
God bless Stoner logic!!!!
(Thu 6th May 2004, 15:15, More)
oo..oo..oo..oo..oo..oo
After two days of need at last years Reading Festival, i finally gave in and marched to the dump shack to relieve my aching bowels.
After taking a full 20 mins to summon the courage to open my sphyncter, i reliquished power of attourney to mother nature and proceeded to give birth to a 17" monster......
As we all know, festival toilets are a little full after 3 days of beer/acid/dog burger tomfoolery, so i had to stand up on the toilet to let gravity cut the cord (so to speak....), anyway, there was a half in / half out situation and then someone opened the door, and i was stoned, and i started laughing, and they didn't understand, and it was all bad....
God bless Stoner logic!!!!
(Thu 6th May 2004, 15:15, More)
» World's Most Hated Food
All the things that make your belches taste like napalm
Blue Cheese - Just eat yesterdays socks instead
Fray Bentos - Pie in can......hmmmm
Tripe - Just the thought makes me want to boak.
Creme de Menthe- Nasty nasty nasty bad man.
Smash - Try eating it dry, it solidifies in your throat MING!!!!
Weisswurst - Like eating a tramps cock...wrong....so very wrong.
(Tue 13th Jul 2004, 14:08, More)
All the things that make your belches taste like napalm
Blue Cheese - Just eat yesterdays socks instead
Fray Bentos - Pie in can......hmmmm
Tripe - Just the thought makes me want to boak.
Creme de Menthe- Nasty nasty nasty bad man.
Smash - Try eating it dry, it solidifies in your throat MING!!!!
Weisswurst - Like eating a tramps cock...wrong....so very wrong.
(Tue 13th Jul 2004, 14:08, More)
» World's Most Hated Food
Swede
What the fuck is swede all about? I spent the formative years of my miserable existence being force-fed swede and carrot mash.
*BLURT*
And that goddam awful Jamie Oliver has got a lot to answer for....My mother in all of her ineffable wisdom decided that "Salted Capers" were the new "In" food, and that we should be forced to eat them....I'd prefer to lick a theiving gypsy bastards internal warts, Its like eating pure herpes.
(Tue 13th Jul 2004, 14:00, More)
Swede
What the fuck is swede all about? I spent the formative years of my miserable existence being force-fed swede and carrot mash.
*BLURT*
And that goddam awful Jamie Oliver has got a lot to answer for....My mother in all of her ineffable wisdom decided that "Salted Capers" were the new "In" food, and that we should be forced to eat them....I'd prefer to lick a theiving gypsy bastards internal warts, Its like eating pure herpes.
(Tue 13th Jul 2004, 14:00, More)
» World's Most Hated Food
Oh the mental horror
Anybody remember Newberry Fruits?
They were fucking shit....
(Tue 13th Jul 2004, 15:25, More)
Oh the mental horror
Anybody remember Newberry Fruits?
They were fucking shit....
(Tue 13th Jul 2004, 15:25, More)
» Inventions You're Too Lazy To Make
Eyebrow Thickening Booth
For those days that you just NEED a monobrow..........
(Thu 8th Apr 2004, 13:24, More)
Eyebrow Thickening Booth
For those days that you just NEED a monobrow..........
(Thu 8th Apr 2004, 13:24, More)