» My Christmas Nightmare

car crash and mentalists
laaaast christmas was the one of evil. in october i was in a major car crash where i broke my pelvis in four places, the break messed up the blood flow in my body and a blood clot travelled into my lung.
after being in hospital for fucking ages because of my pelvis (and whilst being there being given two morphine overdoses, each nearly killed me), i came home on a drug called warfarin, to thin my blood, this made me haemorrhage at christmas time, i went into hospital where i lost in total two thirds of the blood in my body.
a couple of days before christmas, i'm sitting in hospital in and of conciousness due to blood loss, the curtain pulls back and reveals, HURRAY, my two time post op transexual MENTAL crazy father. oh joy.
when i come home for christmas (just), he proceeds to not talk to me for a week because i didn't go with him and the family to london on a train to see phantom of the opera stageshowness, which he had bought us all tickets for.
despite the fact i still couldn't actually walk. hurray.
incidently, just after christmas it snowed, i ventured out for the first time in ages, slipped on the ice and broke my wrist and elbow, which both swelled up massively because of the drugs. and then i broke my knee, and had it operated on. all just festive and fun reeeeally.... sorry for length
(Tue 4th Jan 2005, 4:32, More)

» My Worst Date

scary stalker infliction
not EVEN an actual date. my friend asked me to go to the cinema with her, and turned up with a boy she had met at drama school. later found out she had told HIM that she was setting us up. nice. THANKS.
we all go to the cinema, i still clueless, happily accompany them to a restaurant. said mister soon starts going up to random tables asking the people in a very scary voice if they are 'laughing at him'. cue cringing.
as we are leaving he asks for my number, i have fear and silence, but my charming friend gives it to him.
he then harasses me by mobile, house phone and internet for the next few months. rings and then when i hang up stays on the line for HOURS. waiting. *shudder* sends me messages saying if i don't date him he will kill himself. etc etc.
incidently my postman also used to stalk me- read my mail and follow me to work.
i am flypaper for freaks. and not even the good kind of freaks. weep.
(Tue 26th Oct 2004, 1:35, More)

» Little things that turn you on

the horror
not mine, but some of the wonderful kinks i have experienced in guys i have dated.
- a guy who kept trying to get me to make 'cat noises', and would get much more excited when we were having filth and a cat happened to be in the room.
- the guy who sucked my chin. at first, i thought maybe he had missed my mouth for kissingness and was trying to 'cover up' by sucking my chin. that made sense to me at the time. until it carried on. and lasted for like 10 minutes. it was 'involved'. i repressed the horror. a week later in the pub i was heard to cry MY GOD he sucked my CHIN.
- like a week after i remembered the first chin horror, a different guy did the SAME thing. what is this? i feel like in some men's magazine they were all 'women's errogenous zones- the chin', no, no it isn't.
- i didnt date this guy. no. he stalked me. and he liked the idea of having sex with dead people. now he is training to be a doctor. so that's fun.
- the guy that liked having his eyeballs licked. i guess that's not SO weird?
there are more. so many more. but now i need to go curl up in the fetal position and cry. why, why are such boys drawn to me.
(Sat 19th Feb 2005, 18:50, More)