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» Pure Ignorance

More tourist dumbness....
Ok, back to American tourists
Working in a hotel in New Zealand, i deal with a lot of them.

*Trains...
"So do we HAVE to catch the train from the railway station?" 'uhh.. where else R U gonna catch it from? K Mart?'

*All you can eat restaurant...
"Excuse me, are you going to take our order or what?" see that smorgasboard over there....?

*Looking at a map...
"So what's the main street called?" '...Main street' (Kiwi originallity!!)

*Wild Penguins...
"So you can only see them at the beach?" 'No, our Penguins fly..'

*Bed & Breakfast hotel
"What time's dinner?"

*Outside
"Now how do we get back out to the front?" '..Hmmm, try the front door (it's right behind you, its also the way you came in)'

*Telephones
"How do I use the phone in my room?" 'The same as a phone anywhere else, pick it up, press the buttons....'


There are many more dumb questions, but I can't remember them all
(Sun 9th Jan 2005, 5:08, More)

» My Worst Date

Worst date
I'll try not to get to discriptive.
I work in a hotel & i was dating a guest (something the boss doesn't approve of)
Anyway having drinks in the hotel's bar one nite.
Guy goes to the loo, and doesn't return. I go to investigate. I'm greeted by a REALLY smelly men's loo's.
my date has locked himself into the only cubical and has fallen into a really deep intoxicated sleep - mid-way during a shit!!
there is no way of waking this guy, i even started slapping his face with a wet cloth but to no avail.As i didn't want anyone to walk in and find out what was going on ( a bit dodge when i'm not even supposed to be dating the guy)
I'm too nice, i should've just left him there, but instead i got other staff to give me a hand to pull his pants back up and push him back up to his room on a luggage trolly
needless to say, the boss found out i was seeing the guy and i got into ALOT of shit.

P.S the guy wasn't even worth the hassel as it turned out his was fuckhead
(Sun 24th Oct 2004, 5:08, More)

» I hurt my rude bits

Childbirth
Now THAT hurt.

Hammer of Justice, I believe you were told that Kidney Stones are worst pain because you'll never experience childbirth.

Childbirth doesn't only hurt while its happening, but hours before it and weeks after it
(Fri 21st Jul 2006, 0:47, More)

» Evidence that you're getting old

When i start to sound more & more like my mother
eeeeek!
(Sat 30th Oct 2004, 1:28, More)