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- a member for 19 years, 2 months and 16 days
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» My most gullible moment
My girlfriend
is especially gullible and over time I've managed to convince her that
- Some pople get their pelvis's removed, entirely
- Testicles are named after a famous greek warrior called testikles who fought in the nude
- A wedding ring that features for 2seconds in hellboy 2 is actually Sauron's one ring (after a comic book tie in between the two)
- A self defence mechanism of beavers is to rip off their balls and throw them at their attackers
- Condoms are made by people sticking their willys in liquid latex and peeling it off when it cools
Sometimes I don't know why she's with me....
Length? long enough to make a condom fit anyone
(Wed 27th Aug 2008, 12:31, More)
My girlfriend
is especially gullible and over time I've managed to convince her that
- Some pople get their pelvis's removed, entirely
- Testicles are named after a famous greek warrior called testikles who fought in the nude
- A wedding ring that features for 2seconds in hellboy 2 is actually Sauron's one ring (after a comic book tie in between the two)
- A self defence mechanism of beavers is to rip off their balls and throw them at their attackers
- Condoms are made by people sticking their willys in liquid latex and peeling it off when it cools
Sometimes I don't know why she's with me....
Length? long enough to make a condom fit anyone
(Wed 27th Aug 2008, 12:31, More)
» Public Sex
sex on the beach
I've done some of the old classics of the park bench and on the beach but my housemate and her boyfriend have to take the cake.
They were on holiday in Tenerife and walking home after a night in a club and walking along the beach they decided to get jiggy between the pedaloes. Whilst in the act she noticed that a couple of passing shadows had decided to pick up and walk off with her handbag. And her boyfriends wallet, which had been in his pocket. Round his ankle.
Now this handbag had her passport, money, cards, driving license and dignity, which as you may know, are quite hard to replace.
They stopped mid-coitus and proceeded to quickly get dressed and run down to their apartment. Screaming.
They then had to explain what happened to the Spanish police. And her mum. This was also around the time a couple was arrested in Dubai for having sex on the beach, a fact her mum never stopped reminding her of.
Length? Girth? She was more interested in her bag....
(Thu 23rd Apr 2009, 13:21, More)
sex on the beach
I've done some of the old classics of the park bench and on the beach but my housemate and her boyfriend have to take the cake.
They were on holiday in Tenerife and walking home after a night in a club and walking along the beach they decided to get jiggy between the pedaloes. Whilst in the act she noticed that a couple of passing shadows had decided to pick up and walk off with her handbag. And her boyfriends wallet, which had been in his pocket. Round his ankle.
Now this handbag had her passport, money, cards, driving license and dignity, which as you may know, are quite hard to replace.
They stopped mid-coitus and proceeded to quickly get dressed and run down to their apartment. Screaming.
They then had to explain what happened to the Spanish police. And her mum. This was also around the time a couple was arrested in Dubai for having sex on the beach, a fact her mum never stopped reminding her of.
Length? Girth? She was more interested in her bag....
(Thu 23rd Apr 2009, 13:21, More)
» Accidental innuendo
Was talking with a friend
about laxatives, poo and and arses, as one does, when out of the blue she says:
"I'm impartial to the occasional arse crack"
One of my exams this summer was Analytical Chemistry. They didn't leave very much space on the front of the paper so I unwittingly shortened it: Anal Chem
Don't ask about Highest Occupied Molecular Orbitals
Length? All about the arse
(Thu 12th Jun 2008, 14:59, More)
Was talking with a friend
about laxatives, poo and and arses, as one does, when out of the blue she says:
"I'm impartial to the occasional arse crack"
One of my exams this summer was Analytical Chemistry. They didn't leave very much space on the front of the paper so I unwittingly shortened it: Anal Chem
Don't ask about Highest Occupied Molecular Orbitals
Length? All about the arse
(Thu 12th Jun 2008, 14:59, More)
» Political Correctness Gone Mad
I pulled the white average male card last night
was at a club in manchester and after waiting a phenomenal length of time at the bar not being served i complained to the manager (I was reeeally pissed off see)
I mentioned offhand that the barman (barperson?) was only serving the ladies. As soon as I said ladies he stapped to attention and said "be right with you mate"
Got some free drinks out of that :)
length? long enough to get the manager to serve me personally
(Sun 25th Nov 2007, 13:23, More)
I pulled the white average male card last night
was at a club in manchester and after waiting a phenomenal length of time at the bar not being served i complained to the manager (I was reeeally pissed off see)
I mentioned offhand that the barman (barperson?) was only serving the ladies. As soon as I said ladies he stapped to attention and said "be right with you mate"
Got some free drinks out of that :)
length? long enough to get the manager to serve me personally
(Sun 25th Nov 2007, 13:23, More)