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- a member for 19 years, 3 months and 2 days
- has posted 28 messages on the main board
- has posted 0 messages on the talk board
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- has posted 2 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
- They liked 0 pictures, 0 links, 0 talk posts, and 4 qotw answers.
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» Petty Sabotage
Sys admin fun
As the sys admin at work I have administrative rights over all the computers in the domain. When someone has annoyed me I like to wait until they're on the phone in the middle of their sales patter. Then I remotely terminate the process which relates to their business management software just when they're quoting prices etc. and watch them squirm and squiggle as they explain to the customer that "it's just disappeared".
I also like to remotely plant a picture of say a couple of fat lesbians on their disk and then start that as a process whilst they're on the phone. Imagine their reaction as they are talking to an important customer and a huge pair of beef curtains fills their screen!
PS I also like to use stirrers from the coffee machine to put little holes in all the UHT milk puts and put them back so that they start to stink as they go off!!
(Thu 5th May 2005, 16:20, More)
Sys admin fun
As the sys admin at work I have administrative rights over all the computers in the domain. When someone has annoyed me I like to wait until they're on the phone in the middle of their sales patter. Then I remotely terminate the process which relates to their business management software just when they're quoting prices etc. and watch them squirm and squiggle as they explain to the customer that "it's just disappeared".
I also like to remotely plant a picture of say a couple of fat lesbians on their disk and then start that as a process whilst they're on the phone. Imagine their reaction as they are talking to an important customer and a huge pair of beef curtains fills their screen!
PS I also like to use stirrers from the coffee machine to put little holes in all the UHT milk puts and put them back so that they start to stink as they go off!!
(Thu 5th May 2005, 16:20, More)
» Claims to Fame
Reni's Fleece
For those of you who don't know, Reni was the drummer for a band called the Stone Roses. Since they are my all time favourite band, I went to see Reni at the Sheffield Octagon with his new and fairly crap band The Rub. When Reni came on stage he was wearing two coats with a t-shirt underneath. As the gig went on and he got hotter, he began taking off his layers.
After he had finished his set and I had become very drunk, I noticed that he had left his coats hung on the microphone stand. One of my mates suggested I might like to pilfer one. Imagining this to be a good idea I sidled up to the edge of the stage whilst his roadies eyed me suspiciously. Whilst no-one was looking I grabbed one of his coats and scarpered like the wind outside with my new found treasure. It was only then as I was happily whimpering like a wolf in a trap that one of my mates pointed out my mistake. Instead of nicking the £250 Stone Island jacket, I had taken the £7 Matalan fleece he was wearing underneath it.
The fleece is covered in fag burns and bits of Reni's hair. But being the saddo I am I have never washed it and still have it in my wardrobe (hairs included).
I am such a loser. :-(
(Thu 24th Feb 2005, 16:49, More)
Reni's Fleece
For those of you who don't know, Reni was the drummer for a band called the Stone Roses. Since they are my all time favourite band, I went to see Reni at the Sheffield Octagon with his new and fairly crap band The Rub. When Reni came on stage he was wearing two coats with a t-shirt underneath. As the gig went on and he got hotter, he began taking off his layers.
After he had finished his set and I had become very drunk, I noticed that he had left his coats hung on the microphone stand. One of my mates suggested I might like to pilfer one. Imagining this to be a good idea I sidled up to the edge of the stage whilst his roadies eyed me suspiciously. Whilst no-one was looking I grabbed one of his coats and scarpered like the wind outside with my new found treasure. It was only then as I was happily whimpering like a wolf in a trap that one of my mates pointed out my mistake. Instead of nicking the £250 Stone Island jacket, I had taken the £7 Matalan fleece he was wearing underneath it.
The fleece is covered in fag burns and bits of Reni's hair. But being the saddo I am I have never washed it and still have it in my wardrobe (hairs included).
I am such a loser. :-(
(Thu 24th Feb 2005, 16:49, More)