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» Urban Legends

In school once, years ago
Sitting around in the classroom at registration before the teacher came in, everyone was chattering as usual. My friend decided to pull a bit of a trick on us, and declared, "Do you know that if you say orange really slowly, it sounds like the word gullible?" Thing is she'd said this in one of those silences you sometimes get when for some reason everyone stops talking at the same time, so everyone had heard her. Suddenly the whole class erupts in a chorus of

"Oooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnngggggggeeeeeeeee"

which was absolutely fantastic as it was. What made it even better was that just as everyone started saying it the teacher walked in, to a classroom of teenagers who for some reason seemed to be greeting her with the word orange said as slowly as possible.

She was rather confused.
(Fri 6th Jan 2006, 12:25, More)

» Shame

In Primary School
The teacher asked us if anyone knew what the pink things underneath cows were (Have no idea what she was teaching us about but hey)

For some reason I instantly shout

"BOOBS!"
(Sat 26th Nov 2005, 21:34, More)

» I hurt my rude bits

At school
I was walking down from the top of the campus to the bottom. I see a manhole, the cover is slightly wobbly. Before I even THINK about it properly my legs have decided, Ooh wobbly drain cover I'LL JUST WALK ON IT.

The cover slips. I fall straight down. The only thing that saved me from plunging to the bottom (and probably certain death) was the fact that the lid hadn't actually come off. Oh no. It had flipped so the edge was pointing straight up. Right. Between. My. Fucking. LEGS.

Next thing I know I'm half sticking out of a filthy manhole, my poor ladyparts are bruised and hurting like a big hurty mass of HURT, and I'm surrounded by schoolkids who think they've just witnessed the funniest thing ever.
(Fri 14th Jul 2006, 15:45, More)

» Join us... come join the cult

Scary
When I was younger I joined my local guides group, it was just outside of our tiny village and there were only about 5 of us. I don't really remember much about it, apart from the first time I walked into our guide leaders house.

Her husband was a complete Nazi follower. It is not a pleasant experience to walk into your girl guides leader's house and straight into a room filled with pictures of Hitler, models of Hitler, Nazi flags and looooooooooooooooads of other Nazi memorabilia. It was everywhere.

Oh yeah - I'm Jewish.
(Sat 28th Jan 2006, 13:29, More)

» The Onosecond

Well sometimes
I hit the Post Reply button befor
(Fri 27th May 2005, 10:59, More)
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