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- a member for 18 years, 10 months and 29 days
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» The Best / Worst thing I've ever eaten
One of my dear deceased cats really had a thing for boxes. He loved sitting on them (that's how my 18th birthday cake got squished), and he especially loved peeing on them.
One day I was looking forward to having some chocolate that my aunt had sent me from Chicago. The box was innocently sitting on the counter, and looked normal. So did the chocolate. Yet it took me a second to realize that the piece of chocolate that I was eating tasted ABYSMAL. Cat urine can apparently seep through chocolate boxes, thus marinading the chocolate in salty ammonia nastiness. Blegh.
(Fri 27th May 2011, 6:29, More)
One of my dear deceased cats really had a thing for boxes. He loved sitting on them (that's how my 18th birthday cake got squished), and he especially loved peeing on them.
One day I was looking forward to having some chocolate that my aunt had sent me from Chicago. The box was innocently sitting on the counter, and looked normal. So did the chocolate. Yet it took me a second to realize that the piece of chocolate that I was eating tasted ABYSMAL. Cat urine can apparently seep through chocolate boxes, thus marinading the chocolate in salty ammonia nastiness. Blegh.
(Fri 27th May 2011, 6:29, More)
» Your Weirdest Teacher
Ah yes...
Science teachers are usually the weirdest.
One in particular would get extremely excited about moss reproduction, and when talking about it she would get on top of an unsuspecting student's desk and scream: SEX!!!! and then proceed to howl like a wolf.
When she'd teach us geology, she'd get out all these random rocks for us to identify. Well one of us accidentally dropped one, cracking it. The woman burst into tears, sobbing for her poor rock.
She also kicked her shoes off her feet at people. Hit one of my friends in the face.
She was a bitch.
Oh and a teacher that had taught at our school for years and was loved by everyone had raped one of my friends last year. Both male. :(
(Thu 10th Nov 2005, 2:38, More)
Ah yes...
Science teachers are usually the weirdest.
One in particular would get extremely excited about moss reproduction, and when talking about it she would get on top of an unsuspecting student's desk and scream: SEX!!!! and then proceed to howl like a wolf.
When she'd teach us geology, she'd get out all these random rocks for us to identify. Well one of us accidentally dropped one, cracking it. The woman burst into tears, sobbing for her poor rock.
She also kicked her shoes off her feet at people. Hit one of my friends in the face.
She was a bitch.
Oh and a teacher that had taught at our school for years and was loved by everyone had raped one of my friends last year. Both male. :(
(Thu 10th Nov 2005, 2:38, More)
» World's Sickest Joke
I do feel a bit wrong typing this
hopefully not already been told:
A young boy runs into the kitchen where his mother is busy making dinner.
"Mommy Mommy! Grandma is playing with her shrimp!!"
"Of course dear. Please go find something else to do"
So the boy, a bit dejected, walks out only to come running back into the room again:
"Mommy Grandma is still playing with her shrimp!"
So, curiosity gets the best of her and the mother goes into the living room with her son. Sure enough there's Grandma, playing with herself.
"Oh honey, that isn't a shrimp, that is called a clitoris."
"Oh." said the boy, "Well it sure tasted like shrimp!"
(Thu 2nd Feb 2006, 1:44, More)
I do feel a bit wrong typing this
hopefully not already been told:
A young boy runs into the kitchen where his mother is busy making dinner.
"Mommy Mommy! Grandma is playing with her shrimp!!"
"Of course dear. Please go find something else to do"
So the boy, a bit dejected, walks out only to come running back into the room again:
"Mommy Grandma is still playing with her shrimp!"
So, curiosity gets the best of her and the mother goes into the living room with her son. Sure enough there's Grandma, playing with herself.
"Oh honey, that isn't a shrimp, that is called a clitoris."
"Oh." said the boy, "Well it sure tasted like shrimp!"
(Thu 2nd Feb 2006, 1:44, More)
» Pretentious bollocks
We lurve us sum feedback
Was seeing an incredibly good band in an incredibly hole-in-the-wall place.
So of course the opening band was:
men prob in their 50s, fat, and balding (the worst of which had his shirt off)
and their idea of music was playing the feedback on their guitars from scraping metal along the strings. but that wasn't enough noise...he proceded to screech IT'S ALL WHITE NOISE!! over and over.
cleared out the entire place.
(Thu 29th Sep 2005, 0:09, More)
We lurve us sum feedback
Was seeing an incredibly good band in an incredibly hole-in-the-wall place.
So of course the opening band was:
men prob in their 50s, fat, and balding (the worst of which had his shirt off)
and their idea of music was playing the feedback on their guitars from scraping metal along the strings. but that wasn't enough noise...he proceded to screech IT'S ALL WHITE NOISE!! over and over.
cleared out the entire place.
(Thu 29th Sep 2005, 0:09, More)