Profile for If your not a manc your a wank:
I live in Southern California near L.A. I'm a lifeguard for the local highschool swimming pool. I'm getting out of California as soon as I can afford to.
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- a member for 18 years, 6 months and 17 days
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- has posted 10 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
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I live in Southern California near L.A. I'm a lifeguard for the local highschool swimming pool. I'm getting out of California as soon as I can afford to.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Shame
Brings back
memories of an old friend I used to have. We were both 11 or 12 at the time and he had come over after school to listen to music or what not. I left my room for 10 minutes to go do some chore or something. I return and spy something brown under my bed. I look closer and its piece of poo. I ask my mate about it and he says oh looks like rat poo. I'm thinkin shit now I'm sleepin with rats. He leaves a little while later and I inform my mother about how I now sleep with rats. My mom then informs me that the basterds mother had warned my mom that this mate of mine no longer shit in toilets. He shit and then hid it in odd places. Like under beds. I thought it was a little large to be a rats.
(Mon 28th Nov 2005, 1:47, More)
Brings back
memories of an old friend I used to have. We were both 11 or 12 at the time and he had come over after school to listen to music or what not. I left my room for 10 minutes to go do some chore or something. I return and spy something brown under my bed. I look closer and its piece of poo. I ask my mate about it and he says oh looks like rat poo. I'm thinkin shit now I'm sleepin with rats. He leaves a little while later and I inform my mother about how I now sleep with rats. My mom then informs me that the basterds mother had warned my mom that this mate of mine no longer shit in toilets. He shit and then hid it in odd places. Like under beds. I thought it was a little large to be a rats.
(Mon 28th Nov 2005, 1:47, More)
» Urban Legends
To "The Fwapper : Look at my profile you spackers,"
Bonsai kitten was believed by so many people that a group of animal rights activists talked the FBI into opening up an investigation. Turns out it was a couple of IT college students who thought it'ld be fun to piss off animal rights activists. So people need to get a grip.
(Sat 7th Jan 2006, 5:46, More)
To "The Fwapper : Look at my profile you spackers,"
Bonsai kitten was believed by so many people that a group of animal rights activists talked the FBI into opening up an investigation. Turns out it was a couple of IT college students who thought it'ld be fun to piss off animal rights activists. So people need to get a grip.
(Sat 7th Jan 2006, 5:46, More)
» It's not me, it's the drugs talking
Orange Juice
A little off topic but still interesting. My dad grew up in the sixties in a small town in Pennsylvania. Imagine his mothers suprise when opening the door to leave for work and finding a completly naked woman hiding in their hedges. When his mom went to go help the poor girl, she looked at her and screamed, "DONT TOUCH ME, I'LL TURN INTO ORANGE JUICE." Apparently she was completly serious and the ambulance had to be called to take her away. Wonder what she had taken. I also know a kid who can't go to sleep unless he's stoned and listening to dream weaver.
(Fri 16th Dec 2005, 1:20, More)
Orange Juice
A little off topic but still interesting. My dad grew up in the sixties in a small town in Pennsylvania. Imagine his mothers suprise when opening the door to leave for work and finding a completly naked woman hiding in their hedges. When his mom went to go help the poor girl, she looked at her and screamed, "DONT TOUCH ME, I'LL TURN INTO ORANGE JUICE." Apparently she was completly serious and the ambulance had to be called to take her away. Wonder what she had taken. I also know a kid who can't go to sleep unless he's stoned and listening to dream weaver.
(Fri 16th Dec 2005, 1:20, More)
» World's Sickest Joke
Probably been done
Q: Why was Ragedy Ann taken out of the toy box?
A: She kept sitting on Pinnochios face and screaming, "LIE TO ME!"
(Fri 30th Dec 2005, 22:44, More)
Probably been done
Q: Why was Ragedy Ann taken out of the toy box?
A: She kept sitting on Pinnochios face and screaming, "LIE TO ME!"
(Fri 30th Dec 2005, 22:44, More)
» Birthdays
All average birthdays
except for my 4th one. I was my parents first child and they thought they would do something special for my 4th birthday. I dont remember a whole lot being as young as I was, but I do remember the kids from pre-school were there and one of those little basterds thought he would ride on my tricycle. Normally I probably wouldn't have cared but I had just recieved said tricycle and wanted to ride it at the same moment he did. He ended up reaching it first and decided to start riding it. Well I sure as hell wasn't gonna take that. I pushed that basterd off the tricycle and he hit the floor and started to cry. Then my evil parents came and sent me to my room for being an idiot. So there I was with my big b-day party and I'm in my room cause some cunt thought he could ride my tricycle on my f'n birthday.
(Sat 10th Dec 2005, 5:39, More)
All average birthdays
except for my 4th one. I was my parents first child and they thought they would do something special for my 4th birthday. I dont remember a whole lot being as young as I was, but I do remember the kids from pre-school were there and one of those little basterds thought he would ride on my tricycle. Normally I probably wouldn't have cared but I had just recieved said tricycle and wanted to ride it at the same moment he did. He ended up reaching it first and decided to start riding it. Well I sure as hell wasn't gonna take that. I pushed that basterd off the tricycle and he hit the floor and started to cry. Then my evil parents came and sent me to my room for being an idiot. So there I was with my big b-day party and I'm in my room cause some cunt thought he could ride my tricycle on my f'n birthday.
(Sat 10th Dec 2005, 5:39, More)