» Encounters with Royalty

Gibberish
Growing up in New Zealand, you tend to not encounter that many upper-class famous folk. And in a country where everyone pronounces things as 'Fush ind Chups' (for Fish & Chips) and 'Iggs' (when you mean Eggs), you tend to not get overly involved in foreign-speak. So anyway, Princess Anne is due to visit our school (which is a big deal for little ol' us in the back woods), so we're all read the do's and don'ts (like don't eye-ball the secret service - they don't like it, and dont pretend to 'reach' for anything in your pocket). Anyway, I'm sat at the back of the class thinking that if I'm one of the poor unfortunates that'll get spoken to, I'll need to mind all my P's and Q's. The door opens, two monkey's in black suits with wires hanging out of their ears come in, skope the place out and in comes HRH. The teacher walks up to greet/escort her through our humble classroom. As I'm sat at the back of the class, closest to the door, she zero's in on my direction and decides commence her 'meet and greet' with me.
'Faw, faw faw faw, faw-faw faw-faw faw?'
What the...? I'm thinking... What the hell was she on about?
'Faw-faw faw-faw faw?' she says.
Is she speaking English (I'm thinking)? I'm seeing her mouth move but hearing nothing but unitelligible mumbo-jumbo come out...
'Faw faw?' she queries....
She's speaking with such a posh accent I can't identify a single word coming out of her mouth! How do I answer without getting myself shot? I stall: 'Well, I er.... um... errrrrrrrr.... arrrrrr..... hmmmm.... errrrrrrrrrrr....'
She, blinks, looks somewhat confused and moves on.
I got blanked by royalty because my only response to some incomprehensible gibberish, was more of the same. And now if Princess Anne could cast her mind back to the royal visit of my school she'd feel a pang of pity for the poor retarded boy she once met in the back of a Physics Class.
(Tue 8th Aug 2006, 16:15, More)