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Profile for robneymcplum:
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B3TA gets me through the dark, gloomy days.

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» Top Tips

Secrecy
If you are a member of a girl band and have recently married a black premiership footballer to cover up your racism and his homosexuality, I would suggest not stating this loudly in a Newcastle clubs ladies room as someone may over hear you.
(Mon 18th Jun 2007, 16:23, More)

» Bastard Colleagues

Not so much bastard, as thick.
Daft bint in the cube next to me in an old job I had, brought her own landline phone in from home and plugged it in a spare socket under her desk as she was 'expecting an important call'.
On her home number.
I didn't know if she was joking or not until it rang, she answered it with her home number greeting "hello, 557799etc.......how did you know my home phone number.......?"
(Wed 30th Jan 2008, 13:46, More)

» I don't understand the attraction

Me too.
I also don't rate the lesbian thing, I want to see a bird being fucked by a big giant cock, not being lapped at in the way a minature poodle goes at a saucer of milk.
If I wanted that I would buy a poodle. And some milk.
(Fri 16th Oct 2009, 19:01, More)

» What's the most horrific thing you've seen?

Nasty sight when young.
When I was 12/13 I lived in a house next to a graveyard and behind my house was an area they burned all the old flowers, cards etc. There was a fire once a week maybe. One day me and a mate were cutting through to climb over my fence when I saw what looked like two legs with shoes on
'ha, that looks like a person!' I laughed, as we went to look it was indeed a person, lying face down in the ash and stuff from a previous fire, completely naked. Just above his buttocks and upto just below his neck was a massive cavity where all his back, spine and internal organs had been removed and all we could see was his ribs and chest from the inside. My friend was violently retching but I was amazed and didnt really care till a few days later when I too started having nightmares which didnt end for about a year, until Es were discovered. The man was never identified and no criminal court case was ever conducted.
Dont know about length, he was face down.
(Fri 22nd Jun 2007, 20:57, More)

» Workplace Boredom

I used to
Do this in employers businesses when I left or was leaving, but have now started doing it in the company I work for. I shit in the toilet cistern rather than the bowl for no other reason except it amuses me.
(Thu 15th Jan 2009, 9:40, More)
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