Profile for pizzaforcat:
32/m/Mildly irritated Flex/Flash coder living in a very cold part of Australia. Can't do design for shit, but can make one hell of an input form.
Easily amused.
pizzaforcat at hotmail dot com for the msn thingie
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32/m/Mildly irritated Flex/Flash coder living in a very cold part of Australia. Can't do design for shit, but can make one hell of an input form.
Easily amused.
pizzaforcat at hotmail dot com for the msn thingie
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Cougars and Sugar Daddies
Unexpected non-rejection
When I was a much younger, much goth-ier pizzaforcat, in my more nihilistic moods I'd go to art exhibition openings with my brother, where we'd get truly wasted on free, cheap cask red and compete to see who could get rejected by the angriest lesbian we could find.
Sometimes, however, the shaven headed 50 year old woman in the bikie gear is actually just a 50 year old bikie that is flattered by the attention from a drunken young man, not a bull dyke.
Oddly she was one of the best shags I've had before or since, and we're still mates :)
(Wed 10th Dec 2008, 23:09, More)
Unexpected non-rejection
When I was a much younger, much goth-ier pizzaforcat, in my more nihilistic moods I'd go to art exhibition openings with my brother, where we'd get truly wasted on free, cheap cask red and compete to see who could get rejected by the angriest lesbian we could find.
Sometimes, however, the shaven headed 50 year old woman in the bikie gear is actually just a 50 year old bikie that is flattered by the attention from a drunken young man, not a bull dyke.
Oddly she was one of the best shags I've had before or since, and we're still mates :)
(Wed 10th Dec 2008, 23:09, More)
» I'm going to Hell...
In the clink
A few years ago I was stuck in Alice Springs, desperate for a job. Alice is a weird place to live- there's loads of work there for pretty much anyone with any qualifications whatsoever (even if you made them up- I had a mate once who ended up driving a steamroller because he got drunk and fibbed that he could in front of someone desperate for a driver).
So, one day I got a job working in a gaol, teaching aboriginal fellas how to use computers (which quickly turned into teaching them to read first, then trying to remember how to use NT4, as they weren't allowed to use anything with usb support).
Which is all very well and good. Except that when my mum came for a visit, I told her that things didn't work out too well, and I've had to go to prison, and could she pick me up on her way through...
Sorry Mum :)
(Wed 17th Dec 2008, 0:23, More)
In the clink
A few years ago I was stuck in Alice Springs, desperate for a job. Alice is a weird place to live- there's loads of work there for pretty much anyone with any qualifications whatsoever (even if you made them up- I had a mate once who ended up driving a steamroller because he got drunk and fibbed that he could in front of someone desperate for a driver).
So, one day I got a job working in a gaol, teaching aboriginal fellas how to use computers (which quickly turned into teaching them to read first, then trying to remember how to use NT4, as they weren't allowed to use anything with usb support).
Which is all very well and good. Except that when my mum came for a visit, I told her that things didn't work out too well, and I've had to go to prison, and could she pick me up on her way through...
Sorry Mum :)
(Wed 17th Dec 2008, 0:23, More)
» Hotel Splendido
Brush with royalty
I never stayed there, but worked there for a bit when stuck in Alice Springs after being offered a really good job, and flying for 2500 km to get there, only to be told 'oops, sorry we didn't actually have the funds'...
Anyway, this hotel's claim to fame was that Princess Di and Charlie had stayed there once. This was a while ago, and while there was this creepy little shrine with the table she sat at and the plates she ate off the place had gone downhill.
Badly.
The hotel is now used by drunken locals to sleep/booze up/fuck in when they get the welfare checks and want to go 'posh'.
I had to clean up:
- several metric tonnes of beer cans
- A bathroom full of pubes
- Shit liberally smeared on the bedroom walls (the designers had thoughtfully tiled every surface, so you could hose the rooms out), and once, worryingly,
A used condom, with blood on the INSIDE. On the outside, I could have handled, even understood, but on the inside? Ouch!
But, I got to crap in the same toilet as Di and Charles, I checked.
The inevitable royal flush jokes made it all worth while...
Length? about 3 weeks before getting the hell out of there
(Sun 20th Jan 2008, 22:58, More)
Brush with royalty
I never stayed there, but worked there for a bit when stuck in Alice Springs after being offered a really good job, and flying for 2500 km to get there, only to be told 'oops, sorry we didn't actually have the funds'...
Anyway, this hotel's claim to fame was that Princess Di and Charlie had stayed there once. This was a while ago, and while there was this creepy little shrine with the table she sat at and the plates she ate off the place had gone downhill.
Badly.
The hotel is now used by drunken locals to sleep/booze up/fuck in when they get the welfare checks and want to go 'posh'.
I had to clean up:
- several metric tonnes of beer cans
- A bathroom full of pubes
- Shit liberally smeared on the bedroom walls (the designers had thoughtfully tiled every surface, so you could hose the rooms out), and once, worryingly,
A used condom, with blood on the INSIDE. On the outside, I could have handled, even understood, but on the inside? Ouch!
But, I got to crap in the same toilet as Di and Charles, I checked.
The inevitable royal flush jokes made it all worth while...
Length? about 3 weeks before getting the hell out of there
(Sun 20th Jan 2008, 22:58, More)
» Blood
I feel Babydad's pain
My very British mother used to always say 'skin the rabbit' when taking off a skivvy or jumper...
Fast forward to a few months ago, when I, revelling in the simple rural pleasures of my first kill with a rifle (courtesy of also being a wannabe country type) skinned my catch. After looking up instructions on the Internet, of course.
It all made terrible, horrible bloody sense then, and I wish I'd never ever heard the phrase.
(Wed 13th Aug 2008, 6:45, More)
I feel Babydad's pain
My very British mother used to always say 'skin the rabbit' when taking off a skivvy or jumper...
Fast forward to a few months ago, when I, revelling in the simple rural pleasures of my first kill with a rifle (courtesy of also being a wannabe country type) skinned my catch. After looking up instructions on the Internet, of course.
It all made terrible, horrible bloody sense then, and I wish I'd never ever heard the phrase.
(Wed 13th Aug 2008, 6:45, More)
» I'm going to Hell...
Sharing's Caring
About the same time as b3ta.com/questions/cougars/post325152, my (younger) brother and I were hanging out a lot, getting wasted, hitting on (sometimes) unattainable womanfolk, and having a jolly old time.
Younger bro has this girlie he's kinda keen on- this girl isn't the sharpest tool in the shed, but nice enough. They dally for a bit, until one night we all get off our tits and younger bro goes home, for whatever reason.
Young lass and I then proceed to do the horizontal mosh (as if you couldn't see that coming), which in itself is enough to comdemn me.
But, I couldn't stop it there. I used to be much prettier, and poorer, and supplemented my income by accompanying rich ladies to functions, largely for them to rub thier ex-hubby's noses in it. At that age I thought it was uber cool (it actually wasn't).
Why I'm *really* going to burn is that I recruited this young lady into the agency I got work through. Younger bro was not amused, but comnemned himself to damnation by years later tracking down my first serious girlfriend and bringing her, arm in arm to a family barbecue.
We've never talked about it since, oddly...
(Tue 16th Dec 2008, 0:08, More)
Sharing's Caring
About the same time as b3ta.com/questions/cougars/post325152, my (younger) brother and I were hanging out a lot, getting wasted, hitting on (sometimes) unattainable womanfolk, and having a jolly old time.
Younger bro has this girlie he's kinda keen on- this girl isn't the sharpest tool in the shed, but nice enough. They dally for a bit, until one night we all get off our tits and younger bro goes home, for whatever reason.
Young lass and I then proceed to do the horizontal mosh (as if you couldn't see that coming), which in itself is enough to comdemn me.
But, I couldn't stop it there. I used to be much prettier, and poorer, and supplemented my income by accompanying rich ladies to functions, largely for them to rub thier ex-hubby's noses in it. At that age I thought it was uber cool (it actually wasn't).
Why I'm *really* going to burn is that I recruited this young lady into the agency I got work through. Younger bro was not amused, but comnemned himself to damnation by years later tracking down my first serious girlfriend and bringing her, arm in arm to a family barbecue.
We've never talked about it since, oddly...
(Tue 16th Dec 2008, 0:08, More)