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» Terrified!

I was once walking home at night behind a woman
She started walking faster in that "trying not to look like you're walking fast" way. I picked up my speed a bit, too. She then started walking even faster and so did I.

Then she broke into what I can only describe as a "gentle jog", and when I did as well she went into an all-out sprint.

By that time we were only about 200 metres from my house, but when I got home I was out of breath and sweating.

To this day I don't know what we were running from.
(Thu 5th Apr 2012, 15:02, More)

» Accidental innuendo

Where Ancrenne used to work
You could hire wine glasses and long glasses for cocktails. You could also hire pitchers in which to mix your Pimms. This was a free service, but of course there was a small (refundable) charge.

Or, as my boss said, to a rather charming, and amply bosomed young lady, 'there's a deposit on your jugs'.
(Thu 12th Jun 2008, 18:21, More)

» Stags and Hens

My guilty pleasure is answering QOTW almost six years late
not pissing in my own mouth, nor mentioning sheds, nor staying about from anybody's bins. I'm proper retro with my references.
(Thu 30th Jan 2014, 21:30, More)

» Dumped

She was a bit kinky and wanted to have sex in the car
But I didn't fancy taking her up the ring road.
(Fri 4th Jan 2013, 18:50, More)

» Fantasists

My great grandad was in the trenches in the First World War, and a sniper shot at him and ripped his tongue clean out of his mouth
But he doesn't like to talk about it
(Fri 6th Jun 2014, 11:08, More)
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