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Profile for Sexy goat buman:
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After inventing the internet, I retired to bed for the evening.
The next day, I spent my morning clearing the spam from my email. I replied to a gentleman's request for fellatio, with pictures, or it didn't happen.

The previous week was spent water skiing with a braddock twin stuffed down my long johns, which only days prior had been monks.

In the unlikely event of fire, I shut off my gas main, and threw a quid at an octopus, who for some untold reason had decided that the life of a seaman was not for him. Several, episodes of Monty Python prequels later, I discovered that it was in fact not a comma, which unbeknownest to the lord of the livery was now illegal in 8 of the 10 capital areas, but the hitherto unbekempt question mark, signifying nothing.

This was too much for poor Jake to bear, so he ate the remaining jaffa cakes, and sold the whole sordid story to the Mirror for a tenner and a six pack of Scrumpy's finest. The lord mayor did have it on good authority, and whose authority begged to be questioned, that the said lump was indeed a maladiction foisted upon the working classes by the malignant new Labour thatcherites who had surplanted the un-usurped junior revolutionairies deemed by the false consitution of Queen Anne to be the legitimate heads of the now defunct state church of The Chuch of England. Mais, apres le jeune de jeunesse il faut avoir, peut-etre, trouver les choses que le signe de dimanche a mange' avant de choisir le son peche. De temps en temps, les autres (qui je ne les aime jamais) ont fu un petit mystere in cui abbiamo trovato la sola cosa che les francienes sont justified in making their own false accusations.

But that's not for here.

Recent front page messages:


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Best answers to questions:

» Neighbours

Second! Yay!
I used to watch Neighbours all the time....

..Until the magistrate told me to stop.
(Thu 1st Oct 2009, 12:47, More)

» Banks

Ahh... fuggit.
Ever seen that movie 'Catch me if you can'?

Well, the exact same thing happened to me.
(Mon 20th Jul 2009, 3:40, More)

» Asking people out

Never fails....
Fuck you're sexy. You remind me of my mum.
(Sat 12th Dec 2009, 14:25, More)

» Banks

May not be true
Guy sees a queue at his banks ATM, decides to go across the road to 'another bank's' atm

Another bank's atm gives him double.
"Woohoo!" he thinks.
Does another transaction and withdraws everything he has in the account. Double again.
"Woohoo x2," he thinks. Then he thinks, "Aha!"

Walks across the road deposits the money his own bank.
Walks back across the road to dodgy atm, and does it all again... for the whole afternoon, until his bank closed for the day.

Walked away with 4,500. Would have been more, but you know those bloody queues in banks, never seem to have enough staff on when you need it.
(Thu 23rd Jul 2009, 2:48, More)

» IT Support

I'm an IT man
I've worked in IT for about 10 years, about 5 years in support.

I can't think of a single interesting story. Yes, it really is that dull.
(Thu 1st Oct 2009, 12:31, More)
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