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That

would account for my dislike of horses too.
That, and the fact that they poo all over the road, and the people who ride them are almost invariably terribleh posh rude gits.
I might move to France. They eat horses don't they?

(tomsk, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:04, archived)

They do,

but I dont think they hide in the bushes by the side of the road and leap out when one trots by, brandishing cutlery and gnashing their teeth.
Mind you, I wish they did.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:08, archived)

you're both wrong

horses are just luxury cows, and I like them...

(

rogan, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:10, archived)

Stuff and nonesense.

Cows exist on a higher being.
Horses are mean and have tiny brains, much like geese.

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bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:12, archived)

HONK

HONK!

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munkt0n, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:15, archived)

horses are nice

but nothing beets a good
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:18, archived)

i hate horses as well

what's the point in horses? they are rubbish!

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:21, archived)

I think we should

start a Down with Horses club.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:25, archived)

I agree

Horses are pointless. Down with Horses!

(

Wifey, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:29, archived)

My uncle's brother's son (who is a copper)

once caught a horse speeding 140mph down the M3 to Basingstoke.
the horse said he had some "urgent business" to attend to. just shows how arrogant these horses can be sometimes!

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:31, archived)

I once caught a horse

going through my mums underwear.
Filthy creatures.

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bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:45, archived)

Down with horses!

That's heresy young laddie-buck!!

Why, back in my day people where burnt for that sort of attitude.

More flogging, that's what you need.

(

Equus is still lurking, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:35, archived)

bovine and equus

not seeing eye to eye,
bovine will be flogging equus
after he dies.

(

Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:49, archived)

I think you are all well aware of my opinion of cows.

Satans henchmen. Simple as that.

(

Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:30, archived)

I liked you,

not anymore.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:36, archived)

Well, you and your kind should

refrain from chasing me round dark fields at midnight, when Im only trying to have a quiet bong in the countryside.

Its just rude.

(

Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:41, archived)

"cows exist on a higher being"?

what, like a dolphin?

(

isthisyou?, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:39, archived)

Not at all like dolphins,

They exist in another place alltogether now,
Didn't you recieve a signed fishbowl?

(Turtle_Wrangler, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 15:19, archived)

I like horses too.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:13, archived)

i like the idea of a luxury cow

a ghia model, if you will

(

spacefish bong!, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:14, archived)

I do too,

but to compare a horse to a cow is just folly.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:22, archived)

bollocks.

you're scared of them. It doesn't need a rational reason, you don't like them 'cos you're scared of them. Deal with it - I have tons of silly phobias and it doesn't make me less "brave" in any proper sense.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:08, archived)

Well,

they're fucking huge, and they could kick your head in very easily, or suck your brains out with that extra extensible mouth thing. Fear is reasonable under such circumstances, I feel.

(tomsk, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:13, archived)

I with you on this one,

I say neigh to horses.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:15, archived)

fine!

incidentally, spiders bite too, and bad things can hide more easily in the dark, and daddylonglegses make you go blind if they fly into your face.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:15, archived)

AND

I have noticed that nearly all blokes are big girly girls about horses.
Wol is nearly the size of a horse and he's scared of em too.

Ya big poofs.

(Amerella, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:17, archived)

I got kicked in the stomach

by a horse when I was 5, good enough reason to be scared of them..
cows are much better, especially hairy ones with big horns

(

munkt0n, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:19, archived)

Fair enough for you then, childhood trauma like.

But I've been trod on, thrown off and farted at.
And I still ain't scared.

(Amerella, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:24, archived)

That is a very good reason to dislike them.

I admit I'm a bit freaked out by them, however, seeing as this has sparked a big debate, I am willing, in the interests of scientific experimentalisation, to go horsey riding to see if it's any cop or not. What do you all think?

(tomsk, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:24, archived)

I wouldnt,

you'll get eaten.
But if you do, it should be recorded as a remembrance to your bravery in the face of horses.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:27, archived)

yespleaseyespleaseyespleaseyespleaseyesplease

I'll look after you, it'll be FINE and you'll love it, it's so much fun and I've wanted to go again for aaaaages and if you came too it'd be perfect, like I wanted to in Cornwall but we didn't, and I know you'll enjoy it, it's so great, please please please please please!!

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:27, archived)

Lordy.

Okay then.

(tomsk, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:28, archived)

I have an intense phobia of Baked Beans

This is not bullshit. Totally true. Caused by childhood trauma.

Who's got a stupider phobia than that?

(

Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:32, archived)

i *hate* haircuts

but baked beans wins.. :)

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:34, archived)

Thank you.

I feel like Ive achieved something today now.

(

Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:37, archived)

I have a phobia

about dry cotton wool.

(Jim Pooley, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:48, archived)

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

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Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:33, archived)

blimey - good luck

Mr P made me go snowboarding on the same pretence - I couldn't've been worse at it if someone had cut off my legs with a blunt and rusty razor blade first.

(

pep, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:34, archived)

Good point -

I went snowboarding with tomsk despite having vertigo, and I went back out and carried on trying for 3 whole days.

I can now honestly say that I fucking hate it.
:)
I mean, fuck's sake, why don't I tie my feet together and throw myself down a rocky, slippery slope crowded with morons? WHY DON'T I?

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:37, archived)

I took someone boarding a few years back

on the chairlift, they said they suffered from vertigo. He didnt enjoy that holiday.

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Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:39, archived)

Should have tried skiing instead

Boarding is for hippies. :-)

(

Wifey, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:41, archived)

skiing is for puffs

who wear one peice outfits

: P

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Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:44, archived)

do it!

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munkt0n, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:27, archived)

You'd have to go on a super easy one,

so you might be quite bored.

And it'll make your legs and bum hurt.

But if it stops you being scared, go for it!

(Amerella, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:30, archived)

I'm not scared of horses.

And I shall prove it.
No-one believes me but I don't care.

(tomsk, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:35, archived)

Sounds like a challange.

If you find yourself with time to spare and end up near bristol then hows about you come and ride my horse?

She's nice and not all that dangerous.

(

Equus is still lurking, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:45, archived)

I'll believe it

if the good doctor can attest to your un-nervousness upon riding one.

(Amerella, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:46, archived)

That cos

horses eat babies and spit acid.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:19, archived)

and

they lay their eggs in your stomach.

(

Craymen, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:34, archived)

...and yet not cows!

It's very odd, that. I had no idea so many boys were scared of horses.

Do you think it's from that period aged about 7 where all the girls are much cleverer than them, very scary and completely obsessed with horses? I just can't understand it.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:22, archived)

i like horses.

they have huge faces which make me laugh. and they only do those straw poos, not the horrible runny poos that cows do. my labrador used to eat hot horses poo on the beach when i walked her. greedy bitch that she is

(hazey, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:25, archived)

*round of applause for hazey*

...well done sir.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:28, archived)

You do know that you can

catch Herpes, Diptheria and...erm...Aids from sitting on a horse.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:32, archived)

i wouldnt mind

so long as i could give them a banana afterwards and watch their silly rotatey mouth chew it. then laugh. ahhhh

(hazey, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:35, archived)

Hmmmm could be Dr Freud.

Or maybe they're just big gay poofs.

Sorry I'll grow up now :)

(Amerella, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:26, archived)

Oi!

I used to ride horses!
They don't charge you like cows, and if they stand on your foot they're usually polite enough to stand on the edge of your boot (so it doesn't hurt)!

(Amerella, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:15, archived)

My aunt

used to live in a house on a farmer's land, the cows would follow you around, but run away if you turned round and walked towards them.

(

Craymen, Tue 15 Oct 2002, 13:36, archived)