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# I think he lives at the North Pole.
But I'll ask Mort to see what he can do.
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Thu 5 Jan 2006, 15:55, archived)
# ahha...*rereads Mort post*
*blushes*
(I helped save b3ta! Attila the Bun is not in a right cunt of a mood, Thu 5 Jan 2006, 15:56, archived)
# and anyway, Mort IS Santa. Fact.
www.morttheostrich.co.uk/xmas.htm
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Thu 5 Jan 2006, 15:59, archived)
# Aha.
He only *works* at the north pole. He has a cottage at the south pole, though.
Hell of a commute..
(I helped save b3ta! fukka isn't around as much as he used to be..., Thu 5 Jan 2006, 16:04, archived)
# ostriches have really long legs though, don't they?
(Slurpy The Frog, Thu 5 Jan 2006, 16:05, archived)
#
normal ostriches can give you a nasty kick

Mort won't. He'll just steal your dinner.
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Thu 5 Jan 2006, 16:09, archived)