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[challenge entry]

From the Modernise the Bible challenge. See all 404 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! printmeister http://tinyurl.com/c8s8fd5 for titanic T's, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:08, archived)
# My favourite sports headline ever - "KING ROON"
I still can't work out what they were going for.
(I helped save b3ta! Prequal This is serious business. Very serious., Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:15, archived)
# hehehe!
good ningles to you all!
I'm very tired and my eye is twitching - a result of staying up until early this morning watching "cabin fever". It was a complete waste of time as it was a shit movie. I do however feel the need to do slowmotion martial art moves and shout "pancakes!" non-stop

Edit: I'M FUCKING MOVING DESK AGAIN! OK, so it's just three chairs over on the same desk so a new team can all be in ear-shot, but still... If they touch my red swingline stapler, I'll burn the place down.
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:19, archived)
# While you're down here, could you sort the roach problem?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:34, archived)
# And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year,
and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire........
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:39, archived)
# hahahahaha...love it
I had a 'fuck it, I don't care if they sack me' moment yesterday.

I didn't get sacked though
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:43, archived)
# Were you disappointed?

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:45, archived)
# a little...
I was just up for a good rant about what a joke my place is, and being sacked would have given me opportunity to rant
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:51, archived)
# what did you do?
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:45, archived)
# It seems it's OK to stand around gossiping for half hour at a time (like I dont)
But getting caught on the net, for all of five minutes (as I do) leads to 'a quick word'. Ignoring the fact that I work fucking hard anyway.

Oh,a nd I printed all my wedding stationary on the expensive colour printer
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:52, archived)
# haha, fight the power, man!
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:56, archived)
# It sounds pathetic I know
But after seven years of taking it up the arse, you need a break
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:58, archived)
# Why don't you make some wheels under your desk?
And slowly move around the office during the day?
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:44, archived)
# the desks are all huge and due to the shape, all sort of interlock
I'm sure I said it before, but this is really it - one more move and I'll walk out of the office an dwork form home until I get my own desk, on its own, where no team sits, so as they split and reform for different projects, i don't get evicted.

To top it off, in november, I've got a week long residential team building thing.

This means i miss the first 2 days on teh 3 day long Watford Beer Festival.

I am seething with anger at the moment.
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:46, archived)
# Cunt them in the fuck Steve, cunt them in the fuck.

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 10:26, archived)
# I reckon the squirrels asked for you to be moved ...
(I helped save b3ta! Prequal This is serious business. Very serious., Tue 29 Sep 2009, 9:46, archived)