"I crept downstairs separated some eggs and made some meringues and custard" doesn't sound greedy, it just sounds a bit la-di-fucking-da. I lived in a shit neighbourhood, turning your telly off when you wasn't watching it marked you out as some sort of toffee-nosed twat. Never mind separating eggs, that would've made the neighbours run me out of town.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 18 Apr 2011, 22:53, 1 reply)

You'd have been the envy of the homeless hostel with all your meringues and custard.
There are few better ways to make friends with violent alcoholics than a nice bit of Eton Mess.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 18 Apr 2011, 22:58, closed)

I can't say
I have Eton Mess.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 18 Apr 2011, 23:02, closed)

you don't want to be there when they discover it's not
sherry trifle.
(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:37, closed)