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This is a question I hurt my rude bits

Spent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."

(, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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Imperial Lather
I have mild eczema. Nothing really horrible, but certain things trigger it. Remember this as you read the following story.

Eleven years ago I was young, free and single and at University. It was the start of the new academic year and there were various fresher events. Being an aged research student, these events didn't usually have much of an appeal to me, but I agreed to go to one with friends. On the night of said event, I was having a shower when I decided to relieve my tension, if you get my drift, with the aid of my freshly purchased Imperial Leather Fresh shower gel as lubricant. Unfortunately, the lovely people at Cussons had recently changed the recipe of said product and added something I was allergic to. When I reached my vinegar strokes, to my horror my willy started to burn, then feel rather sore. The gel had taken the top layer of my skin off! I decided to rinse my poor member. The pain was even worse!

I was in agony but as I had agreed to meet up with friends at the bar in twenty minutes, I got dressed and went out, making sure that I was wearing my most roomy pants and jeans.

That night I pulled. I wasn't even trying, but somehow it happened. We went back to her room and started cuddling and one thing led to another. However I refused point blank to take my pants off. Why? For one, my poor gradually healing willy had stuck to the insides of my underwear and my pubes and, more importantly, I knew that getting an erection would be utter agony. I told her that I had eczema on my willy, but it was getting better. She asked to have a look. Her exact words were 'if you think you are going to put that in me you've got another thing coming'.

I made my excuses and left. The relationship didn't last for some reason.

(Luckily it did heal and I have learnt to avoid all shower gels.)
(, Sun 16 Jul 2006, 22:04, Reply)

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