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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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It's Thursday! Yay...
Is there a more depressing day? Fucking wannabe Friday. Cunt

Anyways, what does today have on store for you? Are you going to be discussing Alan Sugar's latest look at me series with Ruth at the water cooler? Stop looking down her top you pervert! I can't fucking stand Alan Sugar, the beardy freak

Today I will be mostly trying to fend off full blown meltdowns from two of my team whilst actually trying to start this weeks work. I shall also be discussing The Walking Dead and mainlining coffee

Alt:
Did everyone sleep badly last night?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 6:29, 262 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
took me a while to drop off
and I had to get up to pee at 6 but otherwise I slept fi-ARGHMYBACK
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 7:36, Reply)
Hang on
Are you me?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:07, Reply)
Thursdays are not as bad as Wednesdays
Today I won't be discussing 'The apprentice' for several reasons, mainly because I don't own a TV and I work from home for a German company (so I don't have ANY colleagues in the UK).
I shall mostly be finishing reports, completing and sending quotes and making appointments for next week. Rock & roll
I slept like a baby - woke up crying because I was hungry and had shat myself -Aithangyew.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 7:37, Reply)
I have to be in work by 9 this morning for my yearly performance development review
Pondering whether I should mention the interview I had yesterday to my manager.

What's the etiquette for this situation?
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 7:48, Reply)
keep schtum unless you have an offer.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 7:54, Reply)
^^^^ What he said
Even if you get an offer, you may decide not to take it.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:06, Reply)
Or more likely they'll withdraw the offer when they've realised what a cunt he really is.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:13, Reply)
Now I see why so many B3tans are unemployed.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:15, Reply)
Traditionally the done thing is to delete your account and kill yourself.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:09, Reply)
Thanks!
*deletes Monty's Account*
*kills Monty*

"My biggest weakness? Hmm, sometimes I don't take the time to read the requirements properly."
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:23, Reply)
Morning Sporty
I feel rotten.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 7:59, Reply)
Cider related?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:07, Reply)
Alt: I don't think I slept for more than an hour.
Am currently wielding a huge bucket of coffee and do not feel even the slightest bit chirpy. Lovely morning here though.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:08, Reply)
Try some of this
www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSNSTerj2Kc
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:11, Reply)
Now I don't feel so bad for my 'trying to depress Bartleby' post below.
You swine.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:12, Reply)
I'm feeling good today, and feel like doing some spring cleaning over the weekend.
Please feel free to break my morale so I just get drunk and watch telly instead.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:09, Reply)
Even when your house is clean it will still be in Luton.
You might as well sit at a bus stop with a carrier bag of White Ace and drink it until you soil yourself, instead.

Hope this helps.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:10, Reply)
Recommending your own lifestyle to others again I see.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:13, Reply)
Well it works for me.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:15, Reply)
We have special tramp shelters for that in the middle of town.
There is even a waiting list.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:13, Reply)
Slept well thanks for asking
Today I am leading an offsite meeting with 30 of my most senior managers across the teams I lead, before taking them all on the piss. Tempted to rush the content of the meeting to get to the pub for opening time.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:12, Reply)
Battered, leading an offsite meeting, earlier:

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:15, Reply)
Monty at home earlier this morning

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:19, Reply)
I would have posted that myself
but I didn't want to brag about my new 'wheels'.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:21, Reply)
U R Stephen Hawking AICMFP

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:44, Reply)
Today, I will be aiming not to go completely apeshit.
Yesterday was the worst day I've had in a long time, so just trying to get past that. Also, in advance, no, it wasn't to do with the football.

Alt: Nope, was up drinking til about 3:30.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:26, Reply)
Sorry to hear that.
I do not have high hopes for today, myself.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:33, Reply)
I've just been informed my line manager will be going home at 11
I'm going to push for a half day
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:34, Reply)
My boss is in Barbados
I am in charge and thus can't go home, much as I'd love to.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:39, Reply)
Not good fella

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:43, Reply)
On the plus side
I just got a spam email entitled 'say goodbye to body acne'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:49, Reply)
Could you forward it to me please.
Thanks.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:50, Reply)
No problem.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:54, Reply)

shit loverage
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:56, Reply)
You should read my poetry
*posts huge picture*
*refuses to refuse it*

Btw, did you know, James Hutchings Is A Cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:01, Reply)
I had heard that he is. The reviews on Amazon of his 'work' aren't too great either.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:02, Reply)
I slept like a fucking log.
I have a feeling I kept my housemate up though cos I'm sick, so I think I'm snoring like a drain at the moment.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:31, Reply)
Freedom is a road seldom travelled by the multitude.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:39, Reply)
You are now about to witness the strength of street knowledge.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:41, Reply)
We are the cheeky girls, you are the cheeky boys.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:42, Reply)
Touch my bum.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:43, Reply)
No.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:46, Reply)
Bender.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:48, Reply)
Touch my bum. This is life.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:42, Reply)
Quender.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:49, Reply)
Prisoner of Zenda.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:50, Reply)
Yo, droppin' mad rhymes in my lyrical blender.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:51, Reply)
Everton Blender

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:50, Reply)
Return to Sender

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:51, Reply)
Fideis defensor

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:51, Reply)
FiDEI

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:05, Reply)
Soz

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:03, Reply)
Pudenda

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:57, Reply)
Spoon of Splenda

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:01, Reply)
The Great Pretender

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:02, Reply)
Convicted sex offender

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:02, Reply)
Yes?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:03, Reply)
I can't believe you fell for that.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:06, Reply)
...shit.
*barricades door*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:08, Reply)
Broken glass everywhere People pissing on the stairs, you know they just don’t care I can't take the smell
I can't take the noise no more
Got no money to move out, I guess I got no choice
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:45, Reply)
Delete your account and kill yourself.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:46, Reply)
Are you sure that's the next line?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:50, Reply)
Yes.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:50, Reply)
My lethal weapon's my mind.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:48, Reply)
I've got a luvverly bunch of coconuts.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:48, Reply)
Racialist.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:52, Reply)
dee dee dee dee dah,
There they are all standing in a row,
bom bom bom,
Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:59, Reply)
You've seen them, then.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:00, Reply)
yeah, was an image I've not been able to get out of my head.
I felt a little violated, truth be told.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:05, Reply)
But they're luvverly! How can you say that?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:08, Reply)
I can say it with total and brutal honesty.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
The face and the lips tremble as it rips
Your breath quickening as heat rushes in
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:55, Reply)
Enough about you and Darth.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:57, Reply)
why are people posting lyrics to gay songs? do they not realise myspace closed 6 years ago

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:05, Reply)
Blame Dozer, he started it

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:09, Reply)
blinding tears will rip the skies when i get hold of him

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
O< ------ I hope to have a quacking day today!!! QOL

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 8:56, Reply)
oh MMPS, you are <i>QUACKERS!</i>

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:02, Reply)
O< ----- ROFQ!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:02, Reply)
wtf is ROFQ?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:03, Reply)
O

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:04, Reply)
laughing your beak off?
oh mmps, you are so daffy
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:04, Reply)
I knows!

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:05, Reply)
i have two songs in my head today, one is
too shy, shy, hush-hush eye-to-eye and the other is that seal with adamantium one
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:08, Reply)
Seal did a track with Wolverine?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:09, Reply)
you know the one
it goes dern-durn-dern-durn-der-dern-der-der-er

and seal is going on about 'how we live and will we flyyyyyyyyy?' or that
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:10, Reply)
oh wait was it the shamen or adam something?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:10, Reply)
I have no idea

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
Adamski, 'Killer'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
no it was definitely the shamen

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Monty is correct

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
then what did the shamen do?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:18, Reply)
Drown off the coast of a Greek Island, I believe.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:22, Reply)
One of my old employees got the dead one's clothes.
He'd been banging the chap's missus on the sly, and when he carked it, she offered him a go through his clothes to see if he wanted any of them. This is a bit creepy.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:24, Reply)
Which one died?
The crusty one or the Scottish one?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:25, Reply)
They were both Scots, and both a bit crusty.
Later addition 'Mr C' is a massive spanner and were there any justice in the world he'd have been the one to die.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:28, Reply)
Yeah, banging someone who's been with anyone from The Shamen is very creepy.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I work with a guy called Adam, who is also a DJ
When I started, everyone called him Adamski. I honestly, genuinely thought it was his name at first, as I hadn't heard of the original.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
Which was his preferred yoghurt brand?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
This is going straight over my head

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
It's probably going below it.
It was a reference to Ski yoghurt.

I'm very sorry.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:16, Reply)
So you should be

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:28, Reply)
this post needs to be made into a musical

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:22, Reply)
I found a copy
of Doctor Adamskis Musical Pharmacy in a box of old cd's I had hidden in the loft.

I think I should have left it hidden
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
Best record he ever made
is the Babysitters EP, recorded with his brother when he was about five or something. It's a DIY punk classic.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
solitary brother, is there still a part of me that wants to LIVE?!?!?
dun-dun-dun-dun-der-dun-dun.

Great song that.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
YEAH

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:16, Reply)
Fuck it. Not Friday but imma gonna listen to this anyway. PLZ RETWEET IF U LEIK!!!!! #dancefuckmonkeydance
www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4eav7dFvc8
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:18, Reply)
shitting fuck, where the fuck did I put my toxi suit and glow sticks? #buildmeafuckingtimemachineanddropmeoffinafieldfullofravers
www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKmhlA2S2KU&feature=related
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:22, Reply)
i like that other one they did about e's are good

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:30, Reply)
I like the one about there being not limits.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:31, Reply)
unh you idiot that was by East 17!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:32, Reply)
didn't they do that song about condensation?
no, hang on, was that bros?
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
BROS did Take On Me and When Love Comes To Town

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:38, Reply)
no, take on me was done by Frankly Does Gone Hollywood.
Besides, I like that song by Simply Reds, you know the one.
Relight my fire, your love is my only de-sire! Relight my fire cause I neeeeeeeeeed YOUR LOVE!!
you know, the one they did with Cilla Black off that dating show on the telly, god's gift or summit.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:42, Reply)
you are benn RIDICULOUS
It was Davina McCall who sung Surprise Surprise with the boyband 5ive
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:53, Reply)
oh man, I love 5ive!
movin on up, movin on out. nothing can stop me now!!!!

classic.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:59, Reply)
THAT WAS S CLUB 7!!!!!
I HATE YOU YOUR SO SHIT AT THIS
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:05, Reply)
:'(
If only I bought just17TOTP magazine.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:16, Reply)
Kajagoogoo were from Leighton Buzzard, fact fans.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)

from Leighton Buzzard, fact fans fucking shit.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
They were "too shy" to tell anyone though

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
who the hell are they?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
They sang 'Too Shy' you bellend.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
a little bit more confidence could have improved their performance

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:16, Reply)
They were featured in an article about 'Two Hit Wonders' in The Word magazine recently.
Which I thought was overstating the case by about 50%.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:23, Reply)
Indeed.
Limahl's smash theme song from 'Neverending Story' was a solo release, and not under the 'googoo moniker. DO THESE PEOPLE KNOW NOTHING?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
In other news, someone I went to school with has just been jailed
He always was a bit of a prick - www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lancashire-17448698
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:09, Reply)
Will his driving ban start now
or when he's let out? How does it work?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:10, Reply)
Not a clue
The road in question is notorious for speeding on though
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
driving bans are stupid, he'll be banned from driving while he's IN prison
although this is still effective, because in 1 year he'll end up ina D cat and may be allowed out to work

but he won't be allowed to drive
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
War is stupid, people are stupid.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Why do they always send the poor?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
they're cheap

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
Because they are the
warpigs
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
They have the power

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
Entertaining cover
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJQy8_Qev28
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:16, Reply)
Got to bed at midnight
been awake off and on since 4am due to a very snotty and unhappy baby
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:10, Reply)
+being

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:10, Reply)
too tired to understand this

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
"been awake off and on since 4am due to being a very snotty and unhappy baby"

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
ah, very good

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:18, Reply)
I wouldn't go that far.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:19, Reply)
nah, but I have zero energy today

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:21, Reply)
WTF is going on?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
YM

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Marvin Gaye's expletive-ridden etc etc

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Slash Four Non Blondes.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I'd love to. With a rusty scythe.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:33, Reply)
aheyayayayayahha aheyayaahhhhh

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:39, Reply)
Allahu Akbar!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:42, Reply)
*rocks like a phone*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:45, Reply)
You're a dick.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:53, Reply)
Happily

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
it's thursday, you started a thread...

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Oh yeah

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:14, Reply)
Has anyone else got DrawSomething on their phone?
It's an absolute productivity-knackerer. More so than this place.

Morning all
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:13, Reply)
No
Fuck off.
Fuck you.
I hope you die.

In other news, morning!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
You're still upset about us stuffing you 7-3 the other night, aren't you

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:25, Reply)
Every time you call me a Leeds fan, I check the train prices for Macc-Norwich.
You're still safe, but I'm considering a murder trip soon
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I would say "you don't know where I live or work"
but Norwich is so small that if you wandered around it for half an hour you'd find me.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
I'd just ask for the 'Town Gayer'

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:39, Reply)
I'm not the gayest man in Norwich
He's got a mouth like a hoover
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
Good old Henry

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
As long as you don't use a permanent marker it wipes off fine.
You could just use some paper though, silly Darth.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
And then fold up the drawing and paper aeroplane it to my mate in Bristol?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:26, Reply)
Fuck knows Darth, I appear to have gone all nostalgic on youtubes. Anyone remember A Trip to Trumpton?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFioBKsnpKo&feature=related
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:29, Reply)
Me.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:33, Reply)
\o/

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:34, Reply)
Hell to the yes

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:34, Reply)
HAHA! of fuck, I forgot about this. Shove an E up your beak hole and dance you big bird cunt!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_fXDfZR-4U&feature=related
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:38, Reply)
maybe...

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
Surprisingly addictive innit
So, who's going to win The Apprentice, Apey?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:26, Reply)
some cunt

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:33, Reply)
Sticking your neck out there
You should change you name to Naked Giraffe
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
Speaking of giraffes
This amused me - www.b3ta.com/board/10720802
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:38, Reply)
No, and I really want it, but my phone is shit.
I fucking loved playing 'Broken Picture Telephone'
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:16, Reply)
Oh god I loved that.
There was another one but I can't remember the name...
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:26, Reply)
I'm not at liberty to say.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:17, Reply)
I know you haven't grandpa

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:26, Reply)
He might have it on his space phone

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I might indeed.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:28, Reply)
I shall be, and indeed already have been,
discussing how I got trapped between two obese sweat creatures on the train this morning and have no body to blame but myself. They were sat on a three seat row with bags on the seat between them to stop anyone else sitting there. So I made them move them for me. One of them actually glared at me and said 'for fucks sake' and didn't move them until they realised I wasn't going to stop glaring back until they did.


The brief feeling of satisfaction wasn't really worth the next 30 minutes of having fat thighs rubbing up against me on both sides.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:15, Reply)
"...but enough about my wife"

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:16, Reply)
haha!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:19, Reply)
you just made my mate choke on his water laughing that hard.
well done.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
big fan of the 1970's working men's club comedy scene eh?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:36, Reply)
Woo hoo!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:37, Reply)
Oi! Tell your non-contributing mate to sign up or ship off...

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:49, Reply)
I slept ok, actually.
At least, relative to how I have been sleeping recently.

I shall certainly have a long and fairly depressing day today. It doesn't help that I found an email waiting for me this morning inviting me to some shitty work do. I can instantly tell I don't want to go from the fact the sender finished her plug with
"It promises to be a wild and crazy night."

*shudders*
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:28, Reply)
So, when is the next bash?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:29, Reply)
You work with Steve Martin?
You lucky bugger.


Actually, on second thoughts, I bet that wouldn't be anywhere near as much fun as it sounds.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:29, Reply)
Steve Martin has not been remotely entertaining for at least thirty years.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:32, Reply)
I'm sure he could entertain scarpe with his bluegrass playing

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:00, Reply)
Wakiness GUARANTEED.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:30, Reply)
Short of including a Battlestar Galactica reference, it couldn't sound much more "Simpsons Tie" if it tried

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:33, Reply)
You have my condolences.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:41, Reply)
Fortunately, I'm under no obligation to turn up.
(I'm sure the rest of the department is gratefully acknowledging the same right now)
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:57, Reply)
Well, if you don't really fancy going
wear your oldest uniform and your second-best shako. A subtle cock snooked and you'll not be invited back.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:36, Reply)
I've read that about 4 times and I can't work out WHAT THE FUCK you're saying
/ac
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:39, Reply)
Is this you, or is Crow cross-dress accounting again?

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
This is me.
I'm on the other side of London to the Corvid.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:51, Reply)
Besides,
how do you know it's not Lampito cross-dress accounting as Crowme?
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:58, Reply)
I have cake
I slept on the floor again
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:28, Reply)
Liar

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:29, Reply)
No lies
Leia's birthday cake, its a moist fruit cake made by the wife's stepmum who I like. Plenty of marzipan and pink and purple icing.

I sleep on the floor a lot these days
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:33, Reply)
why are you sleeping on the floor?

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:35, Reply)
He keeps having sex with the oven glove

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:36, Reply)
The sofa got boring, I suspect.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:37, Reply)
sofa so good!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:39, Reply)
pretty suite pun dude!

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:40, Reply)
Ooof! With nothing to cushion the blow.
Alright lovelyface? *panders*
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:40, Reply)
Alright love?
Not too bad darlin'. Hope all is well with you.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:41, Reply)
Things aren't great, but they'll settle down soon enough.
How's this semester treating you?
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
Hope they do.
Stress and worry but the weather is picking up which will make a world of difference!
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:51, Reply)
settee down everyone

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:41, Reply)
you should be chaised out of town for that

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:41, Reply)
Your plan is clearly floored
I mean, who will be king geek if he leaves?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:43, Reply)
When I lived in Greenford there was (and maybe still is) a shop called Sofa King
with a poster in the window that read "Our Prices are Sofa King Low!"
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:45, Reply)
they had to change that, i saw it on the news

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:58, Reply)
A longue way away?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
In his DFS, this is a pun sub-thread.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:45, Reply)
Cos things aren't so good with the oven glove
I would sleep on the sofa but the youngun is still waking in the night and so I sleep on her floor so I am on hand to feed/shake her
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:42, Reply)
Emilio Estevez, Kiefer Sutherland, Lou Diamond Phillips, Charlie Sheen, Dermot Mulroney and Casey Siemaszko,
keep waking in the night?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:47, Reply)
Each night I go to bed
I pray the Lord my glove to keep
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:51, Reply)
Keep reminding her that she's in a restricted market for upgrading the kids to a new daddy

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:49, Reply)
By choice?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:36, Reply)
i had a row with my mrs last night too man, its definitely over now
too much water under the bridge and that

right now i just want to get very drunk, wake up next to an unattractive girl i don't know and will never see again and then just carry on like everything's ok
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:37, Reply)
Is that your way of saying she pisses herself a lot?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:37, Reply)
trust you to pick on me when i'm having a tough time
i didn't come here for this you know
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:39, Reply)
wifey kick you out?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:34, Reply)
Never mind that shit, my cake just ran out

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:43, Reply)
Fuuuuuck!
Get to tha shoppa!
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
It's a fucking disgrace.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:45, Reply)
Anyone fancy a jog?
toughmudder.com/
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:52, Reply)
jog on

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:53, Reply)
No ta
I'm on for 8k tonight
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:54, Reply)
I did 6 miles this morning, was chuffed with that
Mentioned it to a workmate and he promptly challenges me to this shit
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:57, Reply)
hahaha!
My 10k run is on the 8th April. I'll do 8k tonight and Friday then 10k next week
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:58, Reply)
Good on you mate
Doing it for charity?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:00, Reply)
Nope
Just to stop being a lolfatty. Still haven't got the stuff through for it as yet actually. I may set up a justgiving page or something
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:02, Reply)
Set up a charity as well
People are more inclined to give if they think the money's not just going to your beer fund
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:06, Reply)
Yeah, that's what I meant

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:07, Reply)
I actually would really like to do an event like that Muddy thing, or a Spartan run
but realistically I'm some way off being able to complete such a thing
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:08, Reply)
I thought a 10k would be a good start, followed by the Great North Run
or the other 13 miler in Sunderland
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:09, Reply)
Yeah I want to do the Robin Hood half-marathon this year
Or the City of Norwich half, except that's in fucking NOVEMBER. Who wants to run outdoors in November?!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:10, Reply)
Eskimos?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:13, Reply)
Yeah we get a lot of them round here
this being the least racially diverse city in England and all
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:13, Reply)
Looks gay

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:55, Reply)
Darling, it will simply RUIN his hair

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:56, Reply)
I don't mind Thursday
I get to nip for a pint after work on a Thursday.
In addition to this I have only just this minute strolled into work.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:57, Reply)
Actually it appears to be a cracking day today
I may have to have a lunchtime pint down the Quayside
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:57, Reply)
Beers all round!

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 9:59, Reply)
An excellent plan without a single flaw

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:00, Reply)

B Qu
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:01, Reply)
It used to be prossies down there but not now
Until I go
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:02, Reply)
I just had to do a poo by torchlight
as the lights in the bog were broken; I can imagine Kroney finds this quite romantic
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:03, Reply)
So in the ladies' it was a case of
'fanny by gaslight'?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:04, Reply)
it was "the bum gravy of the lamp"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:05, Reply)
Safer than by matchlight

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:06, Reply)
Sometimes I light candles all around the bathroom
and put Barry White on the radio before settling down for a nice poo. Unfortunately, last time I did this, it turned out to be the opening salvo from the galloping trots. Quite the turn-off.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:09, Reply)
difficult to transfeer them to the freezer I guess

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 10:11, Reply)

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