Perhaps it is time to move on from Gonz's prose...
Tell me about your encounters with lesbians, regardless of your gender or sexual preference. I have a lesbian mate and we have exactly the same taste in women, so it's always brilliant when we meet up. She's a lot prettier than me obvs.

Alt: what would your perfect home be?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 21:29, 42 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Alright fuck you all then, don't bother. See if I care.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 21:32, Reply)

Hang on, I've woken up again now.
Give me a minute and I'll answer teh question...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 21:41, Reply)

One of my best friends is a lesbian.
We don't share the same taste in women. Quite lucky, really.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:02, Reply)

Lesbians are much more fun than male homos.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:03, Reply)

Depends on your viewpoint, i suppose.
I was never any good at going out on the pull anyway, but I'm not sure if it would be easier or more fun with her or one of my gay male friends.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:05, Reply)

I was asked if I would be a dna donor
by my best lesbian friend when she and her love wanted a baby.
Not in a porny threesome way, probably some kind of turkey baster incident, we didn't get into details.
It never happened but I did feel honoured to be chosen.

Alt. Log cabin right here in the foothills of the Rocky mountains.
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:21, Reply)

Log cabin in the foothills of the Rockies - WIN
One of my dad's cousins is a lesbian. She's an amazing woman, really inspirational - not because of her sexual persuasion but because she's achieved so much and led an interesting life - she's 80 :)

I also have a friend in her late 20s who's a lesbian, very pretty, and a great laugh.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:31, Reply)

Most lesbians I've met are a bloody good laugh....
the dungaree stereotype is much rarer than the media would have you believe (although they do exist).
Girl-spotting with them is hilarious!

alt: something tasteful with a large garage for all my cars (lottery win required, obviously)
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:31, Reply)

My missus used to live in Brighton and I met a few lesbians down there.
As with all walks of life there were some who were a great laugh and others you wouldn't bother with. The annoying ones were the militant types who always seemed to prefer segregation, thinking that gay people should mainly hang around with other gays. The decent ones generally couldn't stand the annoying ones.

Alt: my perfect home would have at least three stories and a cellar, I'd like to be presented with a choice of directions when reaching the top of the stairs, a big kitchen would be preferable and I'd like it to be on the other side of town.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:34, Reply)

Prose is for pussyoles, thats a straight up rap there.
I bought an Apple TV off my boss for £50 today, well, he's given me it for the weekend to see if I want it. I'm gonna give it to Ma' tomorow with my origional iPad that I've set up for her. I'm well good to Ma', not ashsamed of it, I'm a proper mummasboy.

I quite like this, it really could do with having iPlayer or 4od on it though. It'll probably come eventually.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:36, Reply)

THIS IS NOTHING TO DO WITH LESBIENS, LET ME JUST GET THAT CLEAR FROM THE OFF-GO.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:36, Reply)

Your mum is a lesbian now?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:41, Reply)

No, that's Monty's mum, silly.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:43, Reply)

human loves fellow human shocker.

( wanderlust, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:06, Reply)

The more I see of humans
the more I wonder how any of us manage to love each other at all.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:10, Reply)

It's a disgrace
I mean, what is she thinking of with those windows ffs?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:10, Reply)

innit.
Next thing you know you'll be standing at a bus stop in the rain, wondering where it all went wrong and trying t to make your way back to middle earth.
( wanderlust, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:19, Reply)

My stepson has his house all wired up with Apple TV.
It looks quite good, I've got to say. He's got it linked up to all his media collection on a remote harddrive.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:43, Reply)

Sweet !
The only thing I don't like is the remote, it's too easy to lose.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:48, Reply)

We lost the remote for our freeview box thing a few months back and haven't watched telly since.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:50, Reply)

Tape it to your nuts.
Boys always seem to know where they are.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:50, Reply)

I don't know where his nuts are

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:54, Reply)

I think I could have an educated guess

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:56, Reply)

In the cupboard where he keeps all his savoury snacks?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:02, Reply)

I swear down no word of a lie, when I was 18 I used to go Candy a lot with my mate and his dad who dressed in drag.
Yeah', it was weird and all that, but one day me and Dave (my mate) got two of the fittest girls I've ever seen in real life. Not joking, one emo'y (which didn't exist at the time) and the other was a dancer at Spearmint.

We got back to mine, both thinking we're in there. And I'm sitting between them on my couch and dave is making "fuck off, out the room" eyes. Then, suddenly, they both put a hand each on each of my legs, leaned over, and started snogging. A few minuites it was ovbouse I was in the way...They got really pationate and I couldn't move, it was like I was standing between two farraris about to smash into each other.

Then suddenly, one takes the other by the hand into my room and has the loudest sex, like something out of a film. I was really shy, I was only 18, after an hour (which was like 10 minuites after they stopped), I bought in a glass of water and an ashtray, then had a wank in the bathroom, and fell asleep on the couch.

The look the next morning when the guy who lived above me (in a split house) saw us walking to the bus stop, he gave me the dirtiest look.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:43, Reply)

Friends with several, one is a drinking buddy of mine, she's ace.
Alt: If I could own my current place and have my choice of people in it, this would be pretty much perfect for me, I'd say.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:45, Reply)

i know some awful, bitchy lesbians.
I also know some lovely lesbians. Much in the same way I know some awful straight people and some lovely. In other news I am at work, and it's shit.
( wanderlust, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 22:56, Reply)

It could be worse.
You could be home with Catweazle.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:01, Reply)

That was my point, but more succinctly put.
Not the bit about work, mind. I gave up on the catering industry the day before my 23rd birthday and have never worked on a Friday night since.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:01, Reply)

i don't mind working nights, i just dislike working boring parties.
Dammit. Drunk. Phone.
( wanderlust, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:10, Reply)

I don't know any lesbians :(
I know some malegays, is there a gender specific term for them like momos or something?
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:11, Reply)

Gentlemen of the wrong road.

( Infidel , shit and wrong, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:24, Reply)

Well I have a few of these from my fat, short-haired rugby playing days...
however I feel that the internet probably doesn't need to know.

alt: it's just down the road for a cool £995,000 and some lucky overpaid cunt's just bought it.
(berk, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:24, Reply)

Hello you.
Have you been out doing exciting real life things?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:27, Reply)

Not especially, no
although I did have a day off today and went for a nice drive in the sunshine and saw the new Batman film. It was average. How're you?
(berk, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:30, Reply)

Not bad. Same as normal, really.
I'm only still up because I'm waiting for the washing machine.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:33, Reply)

*rock horns*

(berk, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:35, Reply)

I'm *so* rock and roll.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:36, Reply)

alright lovertits?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 3 Aug 2012, 23:41, Reply)

The one that sticks in the mind most was when two young women started intimately enjoying each other's company on a train to Halifax.
I couldn't help having a good look, partly because the exchange was in my field of vision but also because it seemed so dignified, affectionate, and free of slobber that it bypassed my normal "fuck's sake" response and actually made me feel quite happy for them.

Then the more assertive one looked over her partner's shoulder and just made direct eye contact with me without saying anything. I averted my gaze and spent the rest of the journey concentrating on the Telegraph & Argus as I felt quite ashamed for staring.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 4 Aug 2012, 1:14, Reply)

Also, I understand Hebden Bridge (a small town halfway between Halifax and Burnley) is the UK's lesbian capital, though I've seen no positive evidence for this.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 4 Aug 2012, 1:18, Reply)

I used to live above two lesbians
at no point did they say please broady we're a bit gay but all we really want is some cock, no, they just stayed downstairs complaining when I played music too loud.

Lesbians are SHIT.
( broadsword w⚓, Sat 4 Aug 2012, 2:16, Reply)