Don't pretend you have a social life. POST.
So, what question should I ask?

Alt: go and fist yourself to death Freefair. Phudfree or whatever your name is, you as well, wankers.

Altalt: best cure for anger?

Altaltalt: how hot can you take chilli in a meal?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 20:56, 61 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Altalt: Indifference.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 20:59, Reply)

I don't give a flying fuck about your indifference.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:09, Reply)

I can't be arsed to agree with you, but if I could be, I would agree.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:15, Reply)

I can't even be arsed to reply to your post.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:15, Reply)

I can't even raise the effort to tell you how lazy you are.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:17, Reply)

I can't even raise my expectations about this thread not moving at the pace of a spastic in a magnet factory.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:23, Reply)

Wait ... they're magnetic?
I've been luring them onto my cock with midget gems.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:50, Reply)

AltAlt: puppies
or possibly one's own simian offspring. I dunno.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:05, Reply)

puppies are yappy shitbags, children are noisy crapbags.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:21, Reply)

Alright Batts?
I saw some green clouds tonight, it was well bizarre. I also got a nice present from the tax man when I got in.

Altalt: SHUT THE FUCK UP, RIGHT???

Altaltalt: I enjoy a dish my local curry house does which has four chillis on the menu. Unfortunately the effects the day after make my eyes water.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:12, Reply)

Hello mate.
Tax man isn't always the cunt you think they'll be, mind you, they tend to be cunts more often than not.

Bit sad, got to get rid of one of the cats, too stressed by Micro Battered & it's getting to a point where it could be considered cruel.

I am nibbling at a birdseye.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:17, Reply)

Yeah, I saw that earlier. Sad tiemez.
I was expecting the tax present as I paid tax on my redundancy payment for the whole year, but only actually worked the first quarter. It's not as much as I thought it would be, because I forgot that Jobseeker's Allowance count towards your personal allowance, but it's almost enough to pay off the credit card bar a couple of hundred quid, so it's all peachy.

I am also applying for another job, despite only being in the current one for two weeks.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:20, Reply)

Does this fiscal change mean you'll be attending the Sept bash?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:22, Reply)

Unfortunately not.
I'm seeing the Levellers on the Sunday night of that weekend. I've also got a weekend in Edinburgh in October, and a trip to Manchester in November. Plus, with changing jobs my pay cycle is a bit out of synch.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:25, Reply)

Well there is only one way of life
EDIT: and that's your own. Clearly!

Seen the Lev's live several times. Excellent.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:27, Reply)

I've seen them about, ooh, twelve times or so now.
The September gig is an acoustic one at the Sage in Gateshead. I'm very much looking forward to it.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:31, Reply)

Acoustic. Excellent. Last saw them in December.
Really want to go to The Beautiful Days festival they run. Unlikely I will though.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:33, Reply)

I saw them do an acoustic set as 'Drunk in Public' at the Tan Hill Inn (highest pub in England) a couple of easters ago.
200 people packed into a tiny little room. One of the best gigs I've ever been to. Although I nearly used Mark Chadwick's hat as an ash tray...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:35, Reply)

I saw Billy Bragg live in a similar set up.
About 100 of us campaigned in Dagenham against the BNP at the last election. He pitched up at the end of one day and played an acoustic session that was unannounced. Superb.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:41, Reply)

Freefair disappeared; didn't 2.0, just deleted.



THE FUCKING PRICKCHILD WANKER CUNT.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:32, Reply)

I'm on my way home from work
And I've called in to the pub, they are all about the Christmas menu. Too early?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:35, Reply)

Personally yes it is too early, commercially no.
You alright son?

BTW: naming ceremony is delayed, so will be at bash. You lucky cunt.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:36, Reply)

Glad to hear it.
I'd have delayed return transport otherwise.

Work is throwing up all manner of curve, I get increasing seduced by FMCG and backing off the numbers to do something else.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:49, Reply)

Email me details of your thinking and I will share my thoughts and experiences, if they would be of any use.
(Of FMCG natch, not my amazing sexual prowess).
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:57, Reply)

I don't have FMCG or retail on my c.v
Both are far more interesting than finance.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:03, Reply)

You don't have to have the experience to get it.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:04, Reply)

Alright mate?
You anything to do with Caffe Nero? I felt fucking rough after their italian iced lemon drink, it was like drinking sugar, cordial and ice.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:36, Reply)

Nah. Nothing to do with them, think they may be franchised, which always makes consistency of quality much more difficult.
Not bad ta, just upset about getting rid of a pet.

How are things in Gonzworld™ ?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:38, Reply)

Yeah', totally, although this was the new one at kings cross when there are already 2 there before in the same building, so I got a feeling this would be owned by head office.
That's actually a reason why I turned down a job revolutionising a big uk photography brand... all their franchies owned their own websites which I'd have no control over and I wouldn't want to be credited to their stuff, but would like to be acreddited with whatever I'd have come up with. Plus the guy made me feel like he is passing on a weight on his shoulders rather than an opertunity.

I had to dash off before when I suggested it, but you given Gumtree a shot? I reckon someone'd snap up that deal.

It's all good in the hood, got a lovely new dish I've had a couple of nights in a row now. Olive Oil/Spring Onion/Chorizo/garlic/balsamic all boiled up, then served with cold cherry toms on bread. Well simple, but soooo lush. Been looking up violinests on YouTube, can't wait for my one to come.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:48, Reply)

That'll be Snappy Snaps or Jessops then. More likely to be SS.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:58, Reply)

,)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:03, Reply)

Alt: I'm neither Freefair nor Pudders, but I thought I'd give the fisting a go anyway.
I can't see what all the fuss is about really.

Altalt: Smoking a joint always works for me.

Altaltalt: Very.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:57, Reply)

You need to read this
www.amazon.co.uk/Hand-Bush-Fine-Vaginal-Fisting/dp/1890159026/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346706070&sr=1-2
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:01, Reply)

On my wife's iPad?
With her amazon account logged in, so this shows up on her recently viewed items?
I think not.
Also, it's just me here. This is not vaginal fisting I am indulging in...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:05, Reply)

Alright Battered,
My old local is closing down tonight, I should probably go for a pint, but its been shit for years, and I only go in there out of thinly veiled nostalgia.

I like freefair, the boy isn't right, but there is a confidence in him, born from his naivety that I would like to watch being crushed as he realises everything he believes is wrong and he's a wet litle prick.

Altalt: smashing your mums back doors in.

Altaltalt, not a huge fan of spicy foods.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 21:57, Reply)

Alright, Pigso?
How did your gig go at the weekend?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:00, Reply)

it was fucking terrible.
Didn't get a soundcheck, no monitors on stage, appaling drumkit, feedback to buggery.
We got through it, but it wasn't fun, couldn't hear the guitarist or the singer from where I was standing, I'm not even sure our keyboard player bothered to play, they put her right by my bass rig, I doubt she could hear fucking anything.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:04, Reply)

I feel your pain.
I take it this is your own material you are flogging then?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:09, Reply)

yup,
It was for charity, so I didn't kick up a fuss, but seriously, the soundman was a fucking joke.
Got another one lined up for a couple of weeks. It was a bit disheartening as it was our first time out with a new singer, and she was nervous anyway, this is only going to rock her confidence more, and she has such a great voice.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:13, Reply)

How can you not like spicy foods? This does not compute.
You should pop in for a quick pint at your old local.

My mother's STD's would make you extremely angry. They made me feel like that. Bitch.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:00, Reply)

Obviously a raging gayer, Batts.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:04, Reply)

I like a bit of spice on things if it adds to a dish,
But not really, I might chop a light chilli through some mincemeat in my burgers, or a bit on squid to give it a punch, but I wouldn't say I'm a huge fan of the burny mouth.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:07, Reply)

Homo

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:07, Reply)

That's what I said.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:08, Reply)

I was merely validating your opinion.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:11, Reply)

*feels validated*

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:12, Reply)

* winks *
* cooks supper and fucks off *

TTFuckingN
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:14, Reply)

call me a home again,
And I might have a strop.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:20, Reply)

I just got in
Am gleeful to find prince of thieves on 5, I fucking love that film. I have to stay up to watch it, even though I have the DVD - why?

I love a bit of chilli. I always add fresh chillis and blue cheese to any pizza, and stir jalapeños into any ready meal.

On this diet I am only allowed salt, black pepper and red Tabasco; I get through bottles of it!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:14, Reply)

You'd be better off watching the DVD, surely, and skipping the ad breaks?
Then you could go to bed earlier.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:18, Reply)

It just doesn't work that way
God Morgan freeman is a legend
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:21, Reply)

No, it does, honestly.
Insert DVD into player.

Press 'play' on interactive menu.

Watch film, missing all the shitty adverts.

Go to bed before film actually ends on crappy commercial TV station.

Profit!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:27, Reply)

This assumes levels of logic that I simply do not possess

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:36, Reply)

Many's the time I have found myself starting to watch a film on commercial TV
then after ten minutes thought "Hang on, I've got the DVD, I can watch this any fucking time I want," and going off and having a wank instead.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:39, Reply)

if you get one of those fancy boxes that record live tv,
Set it to record, turn over to babestation for a bit, have wank, flick back, go to where you started recording, and if you've had one of those fancy long wanks, you should have accrued enough time to fast forward through the adverts. Whole enterprise complete without ever getting off the sofa, and you get to stay up late.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:53, Reply)

That's a pretty extreme diet.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:33, Reply)

I was thinking that.
The litres of water swipey must go through to combat the thirst; Christ, she'll be pissing like a racehorse.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:34, Reply)

Ha!
Those are the tastiest bits believe me
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:35, Reply)

I'm back at home.
Full of rice and a bit half cut.

Beat that Internet.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:53, Reply)

*punches router*

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:53, Reply)

In your face pub boy!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 22:55, Reply)