German Market
This was an unintentional pun that sent Ms Hanky into a fucking RAGE (as in 28 Days Later) for a whole weekend.

And I honestly didn't mean it. It must be my perversion seeping out at a genetic level.

Last Christmas we were down at the German market they put on outside the Natural History Museum. Think loads of wooden sheds filled with expensive shit women like to clutter up the flat with and you get the idea.

The thing is, they had dressed a lot of the ladies working there in traditional Bavarian costume... Sexy traditional Bavarian costume. Silly hats, frilly skirts, and loose blouses. Very loose blouses that billowed open when they moved their arms revealing more tittage than you'd find in your average Amsterdam sex show.

I felt myself getting a lazy lob-on. Not good. I even had to pretend I had cramp at one point so we could stop and I could somehow command my cock through willpower alone to desist - now definitely was not Hammertime.

As I'm desperately trying to think of Luton Town FC and tractors (100% guaranteed to make you last longer when you're on the job boys, or in this case dull the fiery flame in my trousers), Ms Hanky waves over at a stall selling useless twattery.

"Ooooh," she proclaims. "They'd look lovely in our flat, Spanky! What do you think?" She puts her hand lovingly on my shoulder.

I look up, still thinking about a certain lower division football club and a certain type of farming machinery.

I see a stall selling pots and pans with pretty little flower patterns painted all over them. I hardly even noticed the lady standing behind the stall, leaning forward as she served someone, her mighty milky norks spilling out and nearly blinding passers by.

No, my eyes had settled on what I thought Ms Hanky was pointing at for sale on the stall.

"Nice jugs," I said.

And I could feel Ms Hanky's fingertips start to dig into my shoulder.

She may even have drawn blood.
( SpankyHanky, Thu 5 Mar 2009, 13:44, 2 replies)

Ha!
Lovely!
(Save Us All !!!, Thu 5 Mar 2009, 13:53, closed)

That's really good
*click*

but are you sure you wernt lookin at her tits?
(Grrrrr Tigers, Thu 5 Mar 2009, 13:55, closed)