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[challenge entry] Seen in the Liverpool Echo 17th April 1989


Straight to hell. Do not pass 'Go'. Do not collect £200.

From the Regrettable special offers challenge. See all 220 entries (closed)

(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:54, archived)
# Yikes!
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:55, archived)
# wow.
hell is either smaller than i imagined, or the trains are faster.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:57, archived)
# heysel?
you post-deleter, you.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:57, archived)
# I didn't think that was so long ago.
I feel old now.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:58, archived)
# yeh, sorry.
i hurt my nose.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:01, archived)
# It's
about the same size as Croydon
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:58, archived)
# Is that all
it has in common?
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:58, archived)
# it's like croydon in so many ways
in fact.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:59, archived)
# Indeed
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:59, archived)
# maybe you are stuck on
a tiny circle line for ever, having to deal with beggars, buskers for all eternity
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:59, archived)
# i love the circle line.
it's a train, that goes under the ground, and in a big circle. how good is that?!?
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:00, archived)
# you're a man of simple pleasures
aren't you?
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:02, archived)
# do it in the rush hour
when it's summer
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:02, archived)
# is that legal?
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:05, archived)
# it is
if you don't get caught
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:06, archived)
#
"sorry to bother you ladies and gentlement but i'm trying to get to a shelter for the night and just need a few more pennies to get a roof over my head for the night so anything yo can give me, jsut a few pence would be greatly appreciated, thank you ladies and gentlemen for listening"

the sound of hell is the silence from the thirty people in the tube carriage at THIS point...
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:01, archived)
# so true
you've got the patter down perfectly
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:03, archived)
# But he normally dresses up
like a street urchin and plays the accordian
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:04, archived)
#
"alright mate - buy the big issue? two quid cheers... there you go. listen - that's my last one: i don't suppose you'd mind giving it back to me, so i can sell it again, would you? only it's my last one and i can't get to the office before it shuts now, and i'm still a few quid short of the hostel..."
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:07, archived)
# no no no
hell is when they have a guitar.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:06, archived)
# and uses a small child
to do the begging
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:09, archived)
# i was on a tube when a bloke got on playing some kind of bagpipe.
you don't know what suffering is
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:09, archived)
# :|
Wow, that really got off the topic there, almost philisophical
(, Fri 8 Aug 2003, 0:11, archived)
#
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:56, archived)
# oooooh, blimey.
If there are any scousers around, I'd duck if I were you.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:56, archived)
# yes.
I'm not a scouser, but that's way out of order!
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 18:59, archived)
# oh come on
it's no worse than a lot of stuff here.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:00, archived)
# yeah, maybe not
but jokes about Hillsborough are hardly pleasant

edit - and also yeah, it's not like the rest of the challenge/board is in good taste either!
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:01, archived)
# That's true,
but I know how personally scousers take it. If koit or no.6 were around I imagine they'd have something to say about it
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:01, archived)
# well
its no worse than WTC stuff. not that that is saying much
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:04, archived)
# I agree wholeheartedly.
I'm just saying never, ever, make a Hillsbrough joke around a scouser.

Trust me.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:07, archived)
# that's why
I'm defensive about it, 'cos I work with a load of scousers. But Martian's right - I normally try not to pay much attention to things I might find offensive on here. Probably should have done so then too!
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:09, archived)
# that amazing sense of humour
they are always telling everyone they have, suddenly fails
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:11, archived)
# spectacularly.
I've seen people glassed for it. I kid you not.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:12, archived)
# that's true
but if the parents of jessica and holly were boarders, we wouldn't have posted owt to do with that. and if anyone here had lost someone to shipman, we'd not be allowed to touch that (although my ex-landlord shared a practice with him).

all i'm saying is, you're going to see some things on here - not porn or scat or owt - that you find distasteful. the best thing is to ignore it.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:05, archived)
# I agree with this also.
I never said it was out of order, just that scousers weren't going to like it one bit.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:08, archived)
# i think then it's your duty to stand up for sp3ccylad
when the scousers come shouting.

i'm off home now.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:10, archived)
# Well the compo wasn't...
"Regrettable Special Offers that happen to be in decent taste"

Or it would be a pretty shit compo...

Edit: Or a very short one.
(, Fri 1 Aug 2003, 19:00, archived)
# Fair comment I reckon.
Without breaking taste barriers we wouldn't have comedy. Brass Eye Paedo Special anyone? Keep 'em coming Speccy.
(, Mon 4 Aug 2003, 17:05, archived)