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[challenge entry]
1415: Mort leads England to victory at the Battle of Agincourt Harfleur



crying 'God for Mort, England and St. George!'


From the Messing with History challenge. See all 512 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:38, archived)
# i like mort
a lort
(_, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:40, archived)
# hurrah for pummelling the french
:~)
(I helped save b3ta! MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:40, archived)
# Watched that gun thingy with Clarkson then?
Woo, but pedantry...

The English didn't use cannons at Agincourt. Which was why we had our asses handed to us.
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:41, archived)
# mort wasn't there either.
(schnurricane, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:41, archived)
# I bet he was really
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:42, archived)
# Er...
We won at Agincourt. Quite spectacularly.

Edit: Or am I missing the point? I have been at work for 15 hours now so may not be firing on all cylinders.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:42, archived)
# perhaps damocles is French
(I helped save b3ta! manwithunderpantsonhead older than a Time Lord, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:44, archived)
# We won round one.
But we lost the second leg. Seriously spectacularly. We wuz robbed!
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:44, archived)
# That
wasn't at Agincourt though was it?
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:44, archived)
# I never mentioned Agincourt (see above) :D
I think they had cannons there in the Brannagh Henry V film. So it must be true.
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:46, archived)
# hehe
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:46, archived)
# I'm pretty sure it was Agincourt.
Could be wrong though. Sounds about the right time, during the 100 years war. We won round one because French artillery sucked donkey balls. Then five years later the Fro - er French drove us out with much improved cannons and guns.
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:48, archived)
# Wasn't
Agincourt won by us cos we had invented the longbow. 2 fingers up to the french cos they cut the bowfingers off our prisoners etc etc. Waterloo was cannons...and Balls too.

(I helped save b3ta! Louse POKE 35899,0, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:53, archived)
# Nah waterloo was much later
By the time of waterloo we were using muskets and both sides had cannons.

In Agincourt, round one, we used longbows but the French had just started using cannons. But the early cannons couldn't hit Rick Waller at 10 paces so our deadly accurate longbows massacred them.

Then five years later and with the invention of steel bore drilling, cannons were suddenly very accurate and more powerful. We were still using longbows. We wuz robbed.

But yeah, the whole two fingers thing was longbows/French chopping them orf.
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:58, archived)
# but the cannon in the picture belongs to the French, whom Mort is attacking.
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Wed 1 Dec 2004, 0:01, archived)
# So it does.
It's a fair cop, guv. Shall I bend over and take it like a man now or later?
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Wed 1 Dec 2004, 0:02, archived)
# Wise
in the ways of the cannon you are. Mmmh hhmm.

:)
(I helped save b3ta! Louse POKE 35899,0, Wed 1 Dec 2004, 0:07, archived)
# Gah
I wasn't talking to you :P

I give up, hehe!

Edit: The famous battle of Agincourt had no cannons, and was essentially won because of our use of longbows against the French cavalry, bad tactical choices on the part of the French and poor weather.

Not sure about the location of the 100 years war battle - I am not contesting we got our arses kicked but I don't think it was Agincourt - however I may be wrong!

Edit 2: What he ^^ said
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:51, archived)
# Think you'll find
we handed the french their arses actually
(I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:44, archived)
# It's not a cannon,
it's a Mortar, silly!
(I helped save b3ta! DogHorse plop, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:44, archived)
# D'oh so it is.
Silly me :)
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:48, archived)
# I'm with eggy woof
woo yay to mort!
(I helped save b3ta! manwithunderpantsonhead older than a Time Lord, Tue 30 Nov 2004, 23:43, archived)