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Home » Messageboard » Advertising from the Future » Message 8276126

[challenge entry] In the future, they'll still be cutting you up on the inside*...

*Apologies to Motorcyclists (no offence intended).

From the Advertising from the Future challenge. See all 335 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! LeightonJimbo has remembered his password!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:55, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:56, archived)
# hahaha nice
also, I nearly felt guilty laughing at this: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/south_east/7341450.stm
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:56, archived)
# Ha ha ha!
Whata cunt!
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:57, archived)
# HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAH
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:57, archived)
# dickhead
although it is fucking stupid that they can operate without staff
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:58, archived)
# hahaha, fucking hell
"However, the premises remains unstaffed for much of the day."

Conclusion: Tredegar, Blaenau Gwent is not like Manchester.
(I helped save b3ta! grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:58, archived)
# No, it's more like the 7th layer of hell
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:11, archived)
# darwinism at it's best
(The Goat www.cuttingthroughthematrix.com, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:58, archived)
# ^this
I think we've just learned an important lesson...
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:01, archived)
#
And they're whining to get them banned. I don't use them, so I don't care. But fuck off nanny state. If people are too stupid to live then let them be too stupid.
(I helped save b3ta! Halk, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:58, archived)
# This
with great big fucking bells on
(Goatse not a comedy account, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:04, archived)
# Yeah but if you're a Brit
you either directly or indirectly pay for his health care.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:05, archived)
# TAX FUNDED HEALTH CARE IS AWESOME
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:10, archived)
#
Cheaper to buy him some aftersun and tell him to get on his way than to police the thousands of tanning salons. But yeah, point taken.
(I helped save b3ta! Halk, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:21, archived)
# So?
I pay for the military to protect his silly ass as well.
(I helped save b3ta! chenobble rocking his explorer beard on, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:38, archived)
# maaaaa ha ha ha ha
I was going to quote some of it in my reply, but there are too many gems to pick from.
(I helped save b3ta! Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:00, archived)
# also, you're self-conscious about your acne.


"yeah, cheers for that line mum."
(I helped save b3ta! grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:01, archived)
# I was thinking that too.
But Baloo? FTW?
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:02, archived)
# i know, so racist
;)
(I helped save b3ta! grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:07, archived)
# Hahahaha!
tit!
(I helped save b3ta! Joliet, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:00, archived)
# Ha Ha Ha!..
"His lips swelled up and he looked like Baloo the bear from the Jungle Book," said Mrs Saunders.
Priceless!..
(I helped save b3ta! LeightonJimbo has remembered his password!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:01, archived)
# hahaha... welsh racist!
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:02, archived)
# He ignored signs
so its the salons fault... what???!"!!
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:02, archived)
# It is quite clearly the salons fault.
Bah! You chuffing liberals ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:03, archived)
# haha
of course if the salon staff pointed out the signs and told him he was overdoing it, he could probably sue them for human rights abuse
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:11, archived)
# Well, failing that,
he could have sued his mother for denying him earnings by taking his pocket money away.
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:13, archived)
# 3 times a day
that's just fucking stupid

vain twat
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:10, archived)
# "get outa here - i'm the red guy!"
:D
(I helped save b3ta! grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:57, archived)
# pfffft!
(The Goat www.cuttingthroughthematrix.com, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:57, archived)
# I encountered
a motorcyclist who actually waited for me to turn right this morning.

My gob was well and truly smacked! My granddad had told me of such things but I thought it was the rambling of a senile old hunchback.

Great pic.
(I helped save b3ta! Joliet, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 11:59, archived)
# I know quite a few bikers
and ride occasionally myself- ALL BUT ONE of all the accidents I've seen or known of that's happened to them or me have been because of a female driver on her telephone. I'm female myself, which makes it worse as I think they're letting the side down.

Oooh storm's a coming!
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:02, archived)
# Yummy mummies
on the telephone in their vast land yachts taking Tarquin and Trixibell the 100 yards to school.

Grr
(I helped save b3ta! Joliet, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:03, archived)
# WOULD, though
(I helped save b3ta! grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:11, archived)
# that surprises me
as most of the twats i see on their mobiles are blokes, jus' a humble cyclist myself, but still scares me shitless
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:05, archived)
# I know, it's just a massive coincidence
but still.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:06, archived)
# Oxfordshire
needs more cycle lanes.
Cars are getting bigger and drivers are getting more numerous and stupider.

That said, I firmly believe that if you're driving a car and you kill a cyclist after dark and they haven't got lights or a helmet it's:
a) not a crime
and
b) the responsibility of the dead cylcist's family to pay for repairs to your car.
(I helped save b3ta! Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:08, archived)
# Same for cyclists crossing the road without dismounting
I should legally be allowed to kneecap them. Also, if they ride on the pavement after the age of about 14.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:11, archived)
# yeah
and red lights, they seem not to apply to cyclists

I see them every morning in Chiswick - just cos it's quiet doesn't mean there aren't people crossing the road - so I just swear at them

mostly they just look sheepish and a bit scared, although I am world's least threatening-looking person
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:14, archived)
# Could be the accent
do you sound like you come from where you live?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:16, archived)
# ha, no - I have a slight West Country burr, apparently
this is what comes of being from Inverness
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:18, archived)
# Could be the Bucks
apparently I've got a bit of a burr as well, and that's round here, they say. I honestly don't think I do but my mum says I'm all fine until I call someone my love and it coems out 'moi lehhve'. I don't think so, she's a crazy bitch.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:20, archived)
# i stop for them
i find it infintely preferable to being killed by a car travelling at 90º to me
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:24, archived)
# yeh
i do get pissed off with people without lights. also people who have a flashing light with no static, serves em right if they get hit
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:11, archived)
# All the bike accidents I know of 'round here have happened
because the riders in question were ignoring basic safety and endangering themselves and other people by riding in ways that were fun instead of safe. Which pisses me off a massive amount. I don't care if you want to risk your own neck, but you haven't got the right to endager other people more than they can reasonably epxect based on the rules of the road.

That said, all the near-misses I know of were caused by people in cars not being aware of their surroundings and were prevented by the decent reactions and alertness of the bikers.
(I helped save b3ta! Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:06, archived)
# My, you must have a lot of cunts on bikes round your way then.
Maybe they're all kids or something.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:06, archived)
# Possibly.
I think most of them are actually businessmen, althought I'm not sure where I've got that impression from.

edit: I am aware that responsible and pleasant bike riders do exist in great numbers, but as a result of their polite and thoughtful road use they rarely come to mind when ranting.
(I helped save b3ta! Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:10, archived)
# Ahhh Sunday riders.
Tarquin blatting it down the road on an R1 he doesn't know the first thing about mending. Yes I've met a few of them. Matching leathers, lid and bike. *shudders*
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:13, archived)
# I dont know much of MotorCyclists,
but when I was working in the City, I was nearly run over a couple of times by bicycle couriers riding down the wrong side of the road. They are utter cunts!
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:11, archived)
# Everyone in Town is generally mental I've found.
Especially when in charge of some sort of means of transport. Like bendy bus drivers. Fucking CRACKERS.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:14, archived)
# suddenly I'm reminded of that crappy old advert
with the 70's rock style tune

"..put a brush .. to your bike... paint it black.. if you like.. but get yerself killlllled get yer self kiiiiii-llllledd.."

ah, fun times
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:08, archived)
# that's some funny
cliiiiiiiiick
(kenriise boom shak-a-lak, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:29, archived)