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[challenge entry] too subtle?

From the How History Was Faked challenge. See all 248 entries (closed)

(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:33, archived)
[challenge entry] Repost for Compo.


"In 1939, The Dutch Inventor Mediocre tripped over and landed in a bowl of hot washing. “It was really annoying,” said the maniacal creator of worlds, “I used to be 6 foot tall, but now, and what a lot of people don’t know, is that I am only actually 17 1/16 inches tall.”

“I was so pissed off with the cunting laundry that I decided to wage war on Poland. I was actually with my mate Adolf at the time. He said that I should calm down and sleep on it, but I was so enraged that I told him to fuck off. In retrospect, that was a bit harsh as he was a lovely man, and had only just got a new tattoo. It was of a Sanskrit word meaning Lucky.

“Anyway, as I was so little, nobody saw me start it all, so they blamed poor old Adie. Oh well....”"
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:36, archived)
# Hah!:D
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:38, archived)
# I really never thought that any of these would
ever be applicable to a compo. But it seems I have a few ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:41, archived)
# I hope they're all like this...
you know, more plausible than the real events.
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:47, archived)
# I dunno, I don't know where I saved the pics of him to make more pics, not just stories :(
*continues campaign of slanderous abuse*

In 1983, the Dutch Inventor Mediocre invented Grand Prix Racing. "You see," the terrifying sociopath said, "there was this fella in a bar one day who sat down in my favourite seat. I found out that his name was Ayrton Senna, and I wanted to find a way that I could off him and no-one would ever suspect me. So I invented Grand Prix and waited. 11 years later, I put a banana skin on the Tamburello corner at Imola."

"That will teach the bastard for stealing my seat!"
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:49, archived)
# **snort**
Should be the Alternate Compo this week. :P
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:57, archived)
# NO!
www.b3ta.com/board/9743596

I am the only one allowed to tell the tales, as I am the only one who knows the truth!
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Thu 5 Nov 2009, 0:00, archived)
# Well yeah, you'd win
but it'd be like a game of balderdash. People vote for the story they find most believable. Knowing B3tans, it'd be something to do with kittens and battenburg, or a combination of the two...
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Thu 5 Nov 2009, 0:06, archived)
# You miss the point.
No-one but me is ALLOWED to tell the stories.
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Thu 5 Nov 2009, 0:08, archived)
# On pain of what now? :P
Or do you just want the rest of us to be spared the lynching you'll get when M comes back? :o
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Thu 5 Nov 2009, 0:21, archived)
# Well he gave me permission,
and I wouldn't want to be the instigator of him becoming a meme when he isn't here to defend himself.
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Thu 5 Nov 2009, 0:25, archived)
# that's mental
and i mean that in a good way :)
(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:44, archived)
# No,
HE is mental.

*feels free to abuse Mediocre as much as possible as he is on holiday* ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 23:49, archived)