taking the piss
living in a shared house can be an issue. Usually because of the extra housemate Mr Nobody.

Unless you catch someone in the act of being a tool, you will be forced to admit defeat and live with the fact that Mr Nobody stole/broke/befowled your thing.

When you do catch someone in the act therefore you really want a good explanation.

So when flatmate A was caught standing in his doorway openly pissing out of his bedroom and onto the hall carpet an explanation was due.

us: "A! there is a toilet 10m away. What are you doing???"

A: "but that's EFFORT and shit man." *stumbles back to bed*

Don't see much of A these days
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 20:37, 4 replies)

Liverpool, early 90's, shared a house with a similar animal.
he was caught pissing in the corner of the living room a couple of times and at least once he opened the cellar door and pissed down into the dark.
this carried on after he'd been warned so one night the other 4 of us took our revenge.
i'm not proud of this but we all pissed on his bed whilst he was out.
he never pissed in the corner again.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 7 Jun 2010, 23:55, closed)

Party pissing
Got 2 month notice to quit one place I lived in.
Owner fell on hard times and needed to move in.
I had a leaving party and caught a friend peeing on the living room wall.
When asked WTF are you doing?
He said 'Thought I'd make my mark so landlord will have to deal with it after chucking you out "
On further questioning he admitted to peeing in every room.
I still had a month to live in there :(
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 0:26, closed)

I also knew a fella once...
...who took to pissing in strange places while he was very, very inebriated.

He was once caught trying to piss into an empty Miller Genuine draft bottle placed strategically in the corner of my friend's bedroom, which, let's face it, would be hard enough when sober. He was also seen quite a few times pissing into handbags and shoes at parties...

The funniest incident involved a new flat in a pretty posh area of Edinburgh (Morningside if anyone is interested) that my mate had just acquired for living in whilst at Uni. We all went up for a night-out in Edinburgh and a post-club party in the flat. This particular pee-friendly mate had a tendency to disappear amidst the revelry, only to reappear in a zombie-like state at some later point in the evening.

Not this time - we went a-hunting for him only to find him sleeping upright and micturating into a bedroom cupboard. My mate was not chuffed. He hit him - hard. But that didn't stop the pissing. The poor cunt was decked on the floor pissing all over himself (and the lovely new carpet) while we were all buckled double with laughter.

I still laugh when I think about it.
(god_is_a_ghoti Carpe Deum., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 9:34, closed)

I once pissed on the bedroom floor
.. the mrs woke me up with a "what the fuck?" so I walked to the bathroom to finish off.

as I walked back into the bedroom I slipped and landed in the puddle. Covered in piss I got back into bed and got stroppy when the mrs refused my advances.

alcohol was involoved
( shitkicker, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 14:31, closed)