Childhood AmbitionsHoratioFellatio writes:
"At the tender age of 13, my little hairless clockweights squirted their first dose of testosterone into my blood stream. The result was a mental alarm clock shouting, 'I NEED TO LOOK AT GIRL'S FANNIES.' I reasoned that if I became a Gynaecologist, I'd get to look at fannies all day.
"It was only when I reached the age of about 16 and learnt about STD's and yeast infections that I realised I'd only ever get to see diseased ones."
Tell us about your childhood career ambitions and the moment at which your aspirations crumbled into a pile of broken dreams.
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chthonic, Thu 29 Mar 2007, 12:02)
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Life ambitions - fulfilled, then ruined.Ever since i was a mini-digstar i have always been fascinated by the sea: Waves, reefs, fish, sharks (obviously) etc.
I have no idea why, I grew up about as far away from the sea as it is possible in England.
I lost the mini status and spent several years in the royal navy reserve including one year signed up for real, fixing submarine weapon systems (easier than it sounds kids, all you need is a hammer. And if you can’t fix it then your hammer isn’t big enough).
Then, I got a degree in marine navigation and joined a cruise company, which is almost spelt ‘O&P Cruises’. Turns out they were a bunch of filthy, lying b#stards so I left and joined a maritime consultancy. I now work for a major shipping company with far too much responsibility than I safely should have and enough money to allow long distance holidays, diving and snorkelling over pristine reefs.
Congratulations, I hear you all think.
Well, quite. Until one bored day in the office I googled my own name.
Turns out there is a bloke with my exact same name who is a photographer.
And yes, his entire catalogue is made up of nuddy woman artfully photographed in black and white...
Does anyone know anything about identity fraud?
(, Sun 1 Apr 2007, 20:55, Reply)
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