One of the characters who frequents my local broke his nose and jaw in a bike accident last month,
and mentioned one evening (with stitches and swelling still in place) that this would mean that he would 'have to give up his modelling career'. Another customer named, rather appropriately, 'Simple' Bob, remarked that he shouldn't be so hard on himself, and that there are all types of modelling agencies looking for all types of people and that he had himself signed up to one of them and had a gig modelling underpants on 'This Morning' back in the Richard and Judy days.

The conservation abruptly ended as the rest of the pub either thought 'What?', mulled over whatever the appropriate response is to an old man informing you that he has been on live television in a state of near undress, or immediately got out their phones and tried to find it on Youtube. (No luck so far).
(FartThroughAWalkieTalkie wished you were dead in ditch on, Thu 12 May 2011, 14:10, Reply)