muppetry
I work in advertising and marketing on the creative side. Have done for about 16 years. I’ve seen a few muppets in my time. One of the worst was from a ‘marketing manager’ for a major high street bank, highly paid and in charge of a MASSIVE marketing budget.

“We need a logo”

“sure lets just take a brief then… when can we get back to you with some initial thoughts”

“end of play Friday”

Designs are created rushed to an empty office by courier (5pm Friday – no fucker there obviously)

Client ignores all calls and emails till the following Friday just before lunch. Then calls…

“hi the logos you sent – we don’t like them”

“ok sorry about that, what isn’t working for you”

“don’t know, we just don’t like them”

“ok, is it the graphic device, the font, the colours, the style of execution?”

“yes”

“no which is it”

“look can we get some more different ones, at least 12”

“well that’s quite a lot – it would be more productive to establish what you have in mind and develop maybe 3 or 4 options for discussion”

“no we need at least 12, I need them for a board meeting”

“ok when’s that”

“3 o’clock”

“what today”

“yeah”

“but its nearly 12 now, that’s not really much time”

“don’t you have an apple mac though”

“erm yes”

“well how long does it take to work”

utter.cunts
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 17:48, 4 replies)

Twats
I worked for a while on the other side of the fence.

Kind of stumbled into it and couldn't stand the way it worked, particularly when it was suggested that we shouldn't put our ideas/suggestions to the agency, or give too much info in the feedback as "that's what we're paying them for".

"Um, couldn't we get a better and quicker result if we worked with rather than against them?"

No, apparently the best way to work is to make our agencies just fucking guess what we want then tell them it's shit if we don't like it.

I moved on pretty damn quickly.
( Moey, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 17:56, closed)

yip
another one is

"we need an ad"

"sure whats it for"

"well its an ad"

"yes but who is it aimed at"

"well everyone" (AHGGGG - how the fuck can i target 'everyone' with your shity piss all budget ad)

"ok what would you like to say"

"oh i don't know isn't that your job"

utter.cunts.
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 18:00, closed)

^and this
despite double the advertising budget being spent on research and focus groups...

Mind you, I'm in the alcohol industry, all we do is piss our advertising budgets up the wall.

Hurray for me!
( Moey, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 18:05, closed)

Cunt
Same as above.
(Waspard has your wank bank account details, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 18:32, closed)