"Why are your lights on?"
I have recently left a post manning a Tesco petrol station. One of my shifts was a Saturday night, finishing at midnight. After ten o'clock we'd lock the shop, my colleague would go home and I would serve alone through the hatch.

Part of our policy was not to fetch anything from the shop area while serving through the hatch, as it led to queues building up. The main shop (500 metres away) was open 24 hours, so most people huffed a little when I refused them a ham sandwich and made their way down to the store.

Some customers, however, preferred to stand and argue- a pointless activity, as I would only fetch things for paramedics or the occasional taxi driver.

So, with this background made known, I can deliver one of my favourite pieces of customer relations.

"Hi, pump number 12 and an egg and cress sandwich please."

"I'm sorry, we can only sell fuel and cigarettes through the hatch *taps highly visible sign on window that says the same*"

The following was said in a tone so angry and confused it is usually found only in conversations with train conductors.

"THEN WHY ARE YOUR SHOP LIGHTS ON?!"

"Urm... So I can see what I'm doing."

The customer paid and left in silence.
(Generator cannot be named for legal reasons, Fri 5 Sep 2008, 10:10, Reply)