More DSS spaktardery
I was working on reception at the time. Most of the time it was fine; a bit weird when old mates from school would come in, but generally OK.

One day a woman plonked herself down in the seat in front of me.

"Hello, what can I do for you"?

She then burst into a long tirade about how she was a landlord of a property which she had been renting out to someone but they'd done a bunk without telling her and owed them 3 months rent and she had no idea where they had gone and could I help please.

"I don't think I can", I replied.

"Why not"?

"We're not allowed to give people's details out without their permisson", explained I.

"That's ridiculous".

"No, it isn't, it's actually against the law".

"That may be the case, but it's still ridiculous".

God, make it stop.

"I've got his name and date of birth, you could do a quick trace of his National Insurance number and no one would ever know".

"No, I couldn't".

"Why not"?

"Because it's against the law; and if I got caught I could be prosecuted and lose my job".

"Please"?

"No".

"I don't see why you can't. He owes me three month's rent".

"Yes, you said, but I still can't do it. I'm sorry. Knowing my luck if I did help you, the computer would throw up a random check and I'd be out on my ear".

"Can you get me someone who can, then"?

"No".

"Why not"?

"Because it's... oh, alright I'll go and get someone else".

And so I trotted off to a colleague, explained the situation, who decided to have a bit of fun.

*Go back to start*

We eventually managed to convince the poor woman that we actually could not genuinely help her. She looked crestfallen, the poor cow.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 5 Sep 2008, 12:43, Reply)