the blue people
as many of you may have gathered, i enjoy a bit of a drink now and then. what you may not know it that i'm also slightly agoraphobic. oh, i'm fine going outside, but if you put me in a field on my own, i'll shit myself.

one night, my friend debbie and i were drinking from a 2 litre bottle of "shit mix", basically anything alcoholic we could find, mixed together and topped up with lemonade. we were both pretty hammered, so we decided to go sit on the field behind my mum's house and smoke a few joints.
after the third joint, my natural paranoia kicked in. i began to feel decidedly uneasy, despite the fact that the lights of nearby houses were ensuring that it wasn't exactly pitch black.
"debbie" says i, "let's sit on top of the hill."
"why?" she asks.
"just because," i replied. debbie noticed the nervousness in my expression and grinned.
"you're getting freaked out, aren't you?" she teased. "OOOOooooOOOOOoooooOOOO!! scary ghosts are coming to get you!"
unfortunately, she was right. not about the ghosts, of course, but i was now well and truly freaked right out.
"STOP FUCKING ABOUT!" i yelled. "i just want to sit on top of the hill so i can see all around us."
"why do you need to see all around us?" she queried.
feeling more than a little shamefaced, not to mention drunk and stoned, i said "so i can make sure the blue people aren't coming."
debbie, of course, pissed herself laughing.
"you fucking spaz," she said, "come on, then"
we went up the hill but, unfortunately, paranoia had taken too strong a hold, forcing me to admit defeat and go home.

but who, i hear you ask, are the blue people?
zombies. stupid, pasty-faced, george romero's dawn of the dead zombies.
thats the last time i watch that film before going anywhere that puts me on a para.

zombies. FFS.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 21:43, 6 replies)

When I read the title
the Hare Krishna from dawn of the dead flashed into my mind :D

I dream about zombies fairly regularly, and dress up as one almost every halloween. There might be a case for counselling somewhere in that sentence....
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Sat 25 Jul 2009, 4:33, closed)

i love having zombie dreams
and i dress up as one for halloween too. i think it was just a combination of drink, drugs and agoraphobia that did it.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 25 Jul 2009, 16:55, closed)

You should try Call of duty
I see zombies now in the waking world. Serves me right for playing zom till the early hours, but I'm addicted to seeing their heads explode in a shower of blood! If I close my eyes I see them running, crawling or stumbling towards me.

There's nothing that gets the adrenaline going as spinning around and seeing some mutilated being stumbling towards you scratching at your face!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Sat 25 Jul 2009, 10:01, closed)

oh hell, yes!

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 25 Jul 2009, 16:56, closed)

Me and my mates have a strategy
which often gets us to level 19 of the original map, but we can't get any further than that :(
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Sat 25 Jul 2009, 17:22, closed)

upstairs...
in the corner eh?good with the grenades!
Prefer shi no numa though, that's tough! Ooh yes, almost forgot- new map out next month! see you there.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Sun 26 Jul 2009, 19:34, closed)