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This is a question The Dark

17,000 writes: Everything bad happens in the dark. Tell us your stories of noises and bumps in the night, power cuts, blindfolds and cinema fumbling.

(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 15:49)
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Dragons and GBH
When I was a tiny little flimmy flimmy flam flam I was taken on a camping holiday with my brother and sister by my long-suffering aunt and uncle.

Long ago they had decided against having kids (I think they saw how evil me and my fellow siblings were and we sort of scared them off) but they would try, once a year, to give my parents a break and confirm that children were in fact nasty little bogey munching buggers.

Sooo yes, where was I? CAMPING! We had gone to the lovely cave-riddled Cheddar Gorge for a long weekend and my aunt had decided a good way to keep us entertained would be to take us on one of the cave tours - The Crystal Quest to be precise. This basically involved us bolting around in the dark at 1,000 mph screaming and falling down and up stairs.

After running around for about 10 minutes I was pretty knackered so decided to stop running and walk at the front with my aunt. Holding her hand we wandered into an even darker corner of the cave where the stairs got even narrower. Now I was beginning to freak out, there was some sort of voiceover telling us that a dragon lived around here somewhere and we mustn’t wake him. Now when you’re 7 the last thing you want to hear is confirmation that dragons exist, especially when you could potentially be wandering aimlessly into ones BLOODY LAIR!!

I started sobbing so my aunt picked me up and tried to calm me down, then out of nowhere this guy in a black robe jumps out and shouts BOOOOO! I screamed, my aunt screamed and proceeded to beat the living daylights out of this guy with her pamphlet… turns out the bloke worked there and it was his job to add a little something something to the atmosphere… well he got more than he bargained for that day I can tell you!!
(, Tue 28 Jul 2009, 17:17, 12 replies)
Kids these days.
You can't go out to the skate park without some sly chav pulling a pamphlet on you.
(, Tue 28 Jul 2009, 19:07, closed)
I know, I know
its tragic!
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:13, closed)
ooooooooooooooooooooooooo
That did it for me!
Have a click
(, Tue 28 Jul 2009, 21:54, closed)
Why
thank you! :)
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:10, closed)
Ha Ha!
a mate of mine took his girlfriend there (about 13 years ago). He said the bloke did a half hearted "boo" that made them laugh.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:35, closed)
Maybe it was the same man!!
Perhaps he decided to tone it down after the beating he got from my aunt!?
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:09, closed)
Bah
Worst of the lot, that cave. Come back and see the good ones! And visit Wookey Hole! Go Somerset tourism!
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:37, closed)
Hehe
I have been told about Wookey Hole! I do think I need to go back and investigate properly, I have a feeling I was cheated!! :(
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 11:18, closed)
the mighty pamphlet
such an underused weapon. Click.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 11:00, closed)
Indeed.
Maybe its so underused because of all the years of training it takes to truly master it?
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 11:19, closed)
Oh dear
My dad did that job once... Not for very long I tell you.

Most sneaky at it though - An American once inspected him for a minute, proclaimed him to be animatronic and turned around, before my dad tapped him quickly on the shoulder and stood stock still again!
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 14:05, closed)
Hehe
Now that is crafty!! :)
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 14:45, closed)

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