DIY surgery? Pah!
I do my own waxing.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:25, 31 replies)

Me too!
/hairy arse, legs, stomach, shoulders and back blog.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:28, closed)

So, errr
photos then?

EDIT - oh god, but not of Bert, please no. Unless you've been living it up Greek style again.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:28, closed)

Al
you know you love it! -and since you asked, you're a gonna get some nice pictures of my freshly waxed rump.

Tomorrow.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:31, closed)

DIY Waxing=
ouch!
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:36, closed)

It is a little bit painful
but as a side-note to our conversation the other day about hairdressers and opticians, being waxed by a nice lady IS the sex.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:39, closed)

photographic evidence, as requested

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:43, closed)

Waxing? Pah!
I epilate.

Including armpits.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:44, closed)

^^^^^^^
You are hardcore!
Much respect!
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:45, closed)

@burt monkeysex
Dammit, why did you remind me about the Opticians? I'm going to have to lock Ms Kaol in a dark room now, while I sit in a chair...
( Cawl, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:45, closed)

Gawps at CHCB's warm, wet, sticky
wax.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:46, closed)

Sorry Kaol...
get her to wax you instead, it's very nice!
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:47, closed)

@CHCB
Once you've done it about 15 times, it starts getting easier.

It stops bleeding, for a start.

I tried doing my bikini line with the epilator, but I'm afraid even my high pain threshold won't let me do that.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:47, closed)

My lovely flatmates
at uni once eppillated my feet (I have slight hobbit tendencies around the toes) I screamed like a girl.

Why would anyone intentionally put themselves through that. Especially on, how shall we say, more sensitive areas.

On a further note, my old flatmate used to let me know before she used her eppilator so I wouldn't think the buzzing noise coming from her room was something of a less innocent nature.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:47, closed)

@Burt
Surely that'd be pointless...
Ever since I fell into that vat of radioactive hair-removal cream...
( Cawl, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:48, closed)

I was a bit concerned
when I first looked at the picture I thought it was a sanitary towel, and the reddish jar behind it just scared me a little.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:50, closed)

^ just:
EWWWWWWW. I have some class, y'know.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:51, closed)

al just reminded me
I had a house mate, she was a gorgeous, blonde french/spanish (she was from the north border of spain, but spoke french) girl, she had an epilator, and a vibrator.

Guess which one somehow interfered with the signal of our telly, so we knew exactly what she was up to, every time?
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:51, closed)

Epi/Vibe
Yep, my ex missus had one which ruined our neighbours reception of the Big Breakfast at roughtly 8:15 every morning.

Chortle.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:58, closed)

'...ruined her reception of Big Breakfast every morning'

Big Breakfast -worst euphemism ever.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:01, closed)

@burt
Nice one...
Just waiting for a frankspencer-esque "she took my Big Breakfast between her glistening lips"...

*gets coat, goes home*
( Cawl, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:05, closed)

mrs vipros has (on request)
set about my hairy back with wax and epilator before

getting stoned first really helps believe me

I'd recommend it to anyone going for that, or any sort of beauty treatment
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:09, closed)

@Vipros
I just couldn't get stoned before epilating; when I get stoned, my sense of touch gets heightened (which makes stoned sexytime lovely), but imagine having heightened senses so you could feel each and every hair pulled violently out of your skin? Owooowowowow.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:12, closed)

Bah, waxing is nothing.
As I proved to the ladies at work by volunteering that they apply a strip to my manly hirsuit(e?) calf.

The removal was nothing more than a mere pinch. Explaining the large rectangular bald patch to my wife (and to my friends while showering on a fishing trip 2 weeks later) was a little more painful.
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:13, closed)

Bob
you just reminded me of the joke about the milkman who likes chocolate biscuits, harhar!
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:13, closed)

Bert
What joke is that?
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:14, closed)

This one...
A man comes home one day to find his wife has slept with the milkman. 'For Christ's sake! Not again!' he screams as he throws the milkman out, before turning to his wife, 'I swear, if I catch you in bed with the milkman one more time, I'm going to pluck out every single one of your pubes!'
She promises it'll never happen again and he calms down.
The next day, he goes off to work, and his wife spots a new milkman making his rounds, he looks a little retarded, but she's suddenly feeling extremely horny.
The milkman rings the doorbell, she opens the door and leans seductively against the frame, 'would you like to come in?' she asks.
'Only for a chocolate biscuit.' replies the little milkman. She hands him a biscuit and leads him in.
'Would you like to come upstairs?' she asks.
'Only for a chocolate biscuit,' he replies, and catching onto the theme she takes him and a packet of chocolate biscuits upstairs.
'Take off my clothes and have sex with me.' she tells him, handing him another biscuit.
They go at it, she's enjoying herself loudly, and he's pumping away, while scoffing down as many chocolate biscuits as he can manage.
Suddenly, the wife hears the front door closing downstairs, 'shit, my husband must be home!' she exclaims, and pushes the milkman into a cupboard just in time for her husband to walk through the door.
Seeing the mess on the bed, her husband knows exactly what she's been up to, 'RIGHT. That does it, get on the bed!' he shouts, producing some tweezers from his pocket.
He then slowly and painfully plucks nearly every hair out of her, but the last one just will not budge, he pulls, tugs and yanks, but it just will not budge.
'Come out you little bastard!' he shouts.
'Only for a chocolate biscuit,' comes a muffled voice from the cupboard.

I edited the racism out of this joke, I learned it in Primary School!
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:28, closed)

@ Bert
I learned that one in primary school too, but it still raised a chuckle.
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:39, closed)

i once gave myself a sort of bikini wax...
... I am a man (sort of) :(
... I almost cried :(
... I looked very silly :(
... I am not doing that again :)
(Foulkesy123 The one and only..., Mon 7 Apr 2008, 18:41, closed)

Home waxing and epilator..
Jesus, I thought I was brave getting my tuppence pierced. At least that's over in a few seconds. Kudos to you both. Electrolysis though, that can hurt like fuck as I have found out.

God! the shit we women go through to look less hirsute.

I might grow my beard back and join the circus.
( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 20:03, closed)

Oh God
I am so glad all my furry parts are blonde. I couldn't take it, the razor/wax/coil thingy, I mean.

I bow to you, crackhouse.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 0:03, closed)

i love waxing!
it's so satisfying. mmmm rip.

I also enjoy waxing my roommates back. She is a beautiful tiny pixie of a girl, but is hairy like a baby monkey.
(little fawn, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 22:27, closed)