The worried well
The company I work for sell various products which may (or may not) improve your health. Or at the very least (and this is as much as we can claim) stop things getting any worse.
One of the services we offer to our mail-order customers is a free advice line, which it has fallen to me as the person who appears to know the most about our products, to deal with.
This has caused me some ethical concerns as I don't actually use these products myself, nor do I really believe in the need to.
I did start off in this role trying my best to be honest and give the best possible advice to callers. However, I soon learned that most of the people I speak to have already done their research, know what they want to buy, are going to buy it from somewhere and just want to hear a human voice telling them that they have made the correct decision. So the basic conversation I have usually goes along the lines of:
Caller: I have x condition and I have read that y product is good for this. Should I buy some from you?
Me: Yes. Yes you should.
Caller: Ok, thanks.
Occasionally it can go a little deeper and they might want to talk for a bit longer (and they confess all sorts of intimate details to me, which I really have no desire to hear).
I justify this to myself in that they are going to buy these products anyway (most have already made that decision); they are better off talking to me as I will be straight with them; no harm is caused to them and they leave the transaction happy.

Length? I'll talk as long as you like, if you are buying.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 11 Jul 2011, 13:10, 5 replies)

The thing about this shit is that for most problems it’s the best medicine. 99.9% of all illnesses and ailments get better all by themselves, so if people are going to insist on taking something, best take something that has no side effect (or effect). Unfortunately this avenue of treatment isn’t open to me as I’m not a gullible fucktard.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 11 Jul 2011, 14:29, closed)

If you send me £1,000 I'll teach you how to become one.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Mon 11 Jul 2011, 14:55, closed)

Cheque's in the post

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 11 Jul 2011, 18:08, closed)

It's true
And most of them are just glad of someone who will listen to them moan about their problems for 10 minutes, their GPs unsurprisingly aren't interested if there is nothing really wrong.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 11 Jul 2011, 15:00, closed)

time heals all things
except that rash
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 11 Jul 2011, 15:21, closed)